I Wish I was the Moon
by IndustrialIllusion
Summary: Formerly Called Midnight's Illusion A VincentXTifa kind of story,Vincent and Tifa both have some demons to contend with, literaly and figuratively, while saving the planet... Again. Rated M for sexual content.
1. Chapter 1: A tear shed for those Distant

**Prologue**

And that was that, as soon as he had met them, he was gone. Vincent Valentine had no regrets over parting with the band of misfits that he had come to know as his companions. He had immediately decided when meteor was destroyed that he would return to his solitary life, just short of returning to his coffin back in Nibelhiem Manor. Though he would miss the conversations he had with Nanaki, or the way that Tifa had tried to console everyone and lighten the mood, he knew it was for the best. Even if he had taken up Tifa and Cloud's offer to come with them to Midgar, It wouldn't have been fair to them. He would only be a burden upon their lives, a shadow that would always be there to ruin their happiness.

"I would only serve to harm them both, killing was the only purpose for which I was created, and I can only do as that dictates." That is what he told himself as he watched the Highwind ascend into the orange morning sky.

He would stay there, in the seclusion of mount Nibel, where he could not hurt any of those that he cared for.

**Chapter 1**

**A Tear Shed for those who are Distant**

Tifa stuffed her worldly possessions into a large leather backpack as tears rolled down her face. She packed her old combat outfit first. It brought back so many good and bad memories, the victories she had shared with her friends, the pain they shared in their losses. She then packed her mastered materia, cure, fire, bolt, Bahamut. When she came to the wooden box with her prized fighting gloves, she broke down into tears.

It wasn't fair, why did he have to do this to her. She had given him all she was capable of but she would always be second place to a memory.

_"Where are you going, Cloud?" She asked turning from the counter to see Cloud walking out the door_

_"To find her." _

_Tifa almost dropped the mug she was shining. "But...so...you're just going to leave me then?"_

_"I'm sorry Tifa I have to be with her" _

_"Cloud! She was my friend too! I wouldn't abandon you though to look for her. At least let me come with you!"_

_"I'm sorry Tifa, I have to do this by myself," he said as he opened the door. "I don't even know if I'll see you again Tifa, I'm so sorry."_

Tifa sunk down against the dresser in her room and held the box to her chest and sobbed. She should have seen this coming. Lately he had been acting strangely, not sleeping, not eating, staring into space and mumbling about how he 'couldn't save her'. She would sometimes find that he had wandered from his room and would sit downstairs and hold his head in his hands.

Tifa swung out her right fist and whacked her dresser drawn from her right, making the whole dresser shake.

Smash!

The picture frame landed beside her sending shards everywhere. Tifa stopped crying and slipped the photo put of the pile of glass. Looking at it made salty tars well up in her eyes anew. She touched the corner of the picture. She looked over each of the faces of her old friends. The photo was taken right after Cloud's recovery in Mideel. She recalled Yuffie throwing a fit over everyone looking happy. Barret was smiling, even Vincent's lips had a slight upward angle to them.

"What are you doing Tifa?" She asked herself aloud.

She got up and shoved the picture into her pocket, grabbed her jacket from her closed and donned her fighting gloves. Tifa Lockhart picked up her bag and took a large sum of gil from the cash register downstairs.

Tifa stood back looking at her bar for a while, mentally saying her goodbyes to her home for, as far as she knew, what could be forever. She listened to the definite clack of the lock and strode away towards the city limits. She had decided that she was leaving, she had to many bad memories, she decided to visit some of her friends (the ones whom she knew their location) and start training again. First though she felt that she needed to go to Nibelhiem. Now that her home wasn't really a home anymore. Tifa needed to go there, she needed to start her journey at the one place that now seemed familiar to her


	2. Chapter 2: Chaos

Chapter 2

_Note: For the sake of this story, yes there is a city called edge and just pretend it's located before the swamps in between Midgar. Sorry, the first few chapters are going to be pretty short kay? Oh, and By the way, yes, I do know that Vincent's left arm is just a glove but now, according to me it's a prosthetic. Yes, I did cut off poor Vinny's arm __D':_

His throat was raw from screaming, the agony he was in was comparable to having something expand inside you to the point of you exploding. Blood splattered on the wall as he flailed wildly. The tips of his fingers were bleeding where the claws were coming through. He could feel his back being ripped open by spiny wings. His mouth was bleeding where his teeth pointed and sharpened. His muscles began to expand underneath his skin which was clammy and pale as death. His knees buckled and Vincent hit the ground. He writhed and coiled in pain and arched his back as the wings ripped through his flesh. A new spurt of blood poured down his back and onto the hard metal floor. Vincent screamed as Chaos' consciousness ripped into his mind. He could feel the demon prodding at his brain, seeing what he missed since their last 'encounter'

"Get out!" Vincent roared as he got up and accidentally smashed one of the mako containment devices round him.

_"But I missed you my dear pathetic pawn. I thought you would be glad to see me! So Vinny, When do you plan on getting me out of this hellhole? I've been waiting patiently for some time now and I want to kill something. What about you Vinny, feeling any bloodlust lately?" _

Vincent screamed in agony choosing not to even answer his demon. Instead he ran up the stairs up to the top of the old mako reactor into where JENOVA used to be held. Slamming down the door behind him, he collapsed on the floor in a heap, his wings crumpled around him and laying in a pool of his own blood. He lay there in pain, caught in between being human and something that is anything but.


	3. Chapter 3: A small Victory

Chapter 3

Tifa smashed down one of the birdlike creatures as the others swooped down to assault her. They were around half her weight but had sharp claws and beaks. She dodged one and grabbed it's leg to swing it into another. Tifa jumped back and raised her hands high in the air. Her hair whipped out behind her as a green aura formed at her feet. She gave a yell or triumph as lightning bolts struck the flock down.

"Ha ha ha, you thought you were so damn sneaky didn't you?" she asked the air around her. "But I certainly showed you!" Tifa realized what she was doing. "And you also think I'm kind of crazy for talking to nothing don't you? Well you all got zapped, so it looks like _I _have the final laugh!"

Tifa looked towards the horizon, still brimming with pride over her first monster slain since two years ago when she and her friends had fought Sephiroth. _'Damn' _She thought to herself. That little battle took quite a while didn't it? It was starting to get dark and she had to be in Edge by nightfall lest she be assaulted by some monsters that only came out at night. Tifa broke into a run towards the town in the distance as fast as she could. The sooner that she would get through the town and make her way to Nibelhiem, the better.

Vincent Valentine sat at the gate of Nibelhiem for a while, just staring at the faded lettering on the sign. You could barley read the welcome part of the sign any more. It simply said Nibelhiem in depressingly charred over letters.

He stood there contemplating leaving. This town was starting to drive him insane. _'No,'_ He told himself, _'I deserve to stay here and rot. I have served my purpose and anything beyond that would just be overstaying my welcome.' _He fought himself mentally for what seemed like forever while looking at his gold digits. Vincent was about to turn to leave when Chaos piped up. _"That's my Vincent, take me to somewhere with lots of people, Midgar will do nicely please."_

'_Or not' _Vincent thought to himself as he turned back around towards Nibelhiem manor.


	4. Chapter 4: Nightmare

Chapter 4

_**For future reference, Miakis is pronounced Mee-a-kees, or (me a keys) It's like mad gab. ;D**_

Tifa wandered into the city of edge and looked into the abyss of the metallic grey city.

"There it is," She thought to herself after some wandering. She wandered into the hotel with her backpack slung over her shoulder.

"Room for one please." She told the innkeeper, sliding her gil across the counter. The elderly innkeeper seemed a little surprised at her brief demand of a room. "Sure," he said holding out an old looking key with the number 24 drawn in permanent marker upon its head. She gave him a quick nod of a counter before skipping up the stairs to her room.

9, 10, 11...12! There it was. she jiggled the key for a second or two before the door opened. She stepped into the small hotel room and threw her backpack on the bed. She glanced around. Her eyes traveled from the bathroom to the dresser to the mini bar in the corner. Pleased with her hotel selection, she strode over to the small, black fridge and swung open the door.

"I feel so classy..." Tifa said to herself as she eyes up all the tiny bottles or alcohol. "...I'm stealing all of it before I leave." Tifa laughed at herself before strolling into the bathroom. She frowned at herself in the mirror. Stripping of the uncomfortable men's jacket she placed both hands on the counter and stared herself in the eyes. She looked droopy and frazzled. The picked up her hair in her hands and held it into a high ponytail. "Maybe like this?"... "No." She dropped her hair and turned on the tap o splash some cold water onto her face.

She did not want to spend a lot of time thinking about her situation so she ran out and did a rolling dive onto the bed. Using just her feet to throw off her "Shit-kickers" as Cid had so appropriately call them, she threw her boots across the room and they hit the wall with a satisfying bang. She threw her gloves onto the nightstand beside her and leaned forward to grab the oversized T-shirt from her bag. After undergoing the difficult task of changing while lying down, she rolled under the covers and buried her face in her pillow. She fell asleep almost immediately.

Her sleep was not a peaceful one though; her nightmares came to her again and again all through the night.

_She was standing in the courtyard of Nibelhiem manor, Staring up at the blackened sky. It was the middle of the night and the air smelled damp and humid like it was trying to choke them; she wasn't scared though, she had her closest friend with her. Cloud was on her right with a reassuring smile across his face pale face. She heard a voice. Cloud's face lit up. "is that...you?" he asked into nothingness. The voice came again, but this time with a face to go with it. Aeris stood at the gate to Nibelhiem, a distance off with a sweet smile gracing her round face. "Tifa! Cloud!" She beckoned to them. Cloud ran towards her but when Tifa tried to do the same the heavy iron gates stopped her as they swung shut. She tried to call out to them but her voice was gone, what replaced it was airy gasps. She shook the bars as hard as she could as she saw Aeris and Cloud fade into darkness together._

_She felt her hands burning. The gate was hot like a cattle brand. They left scalds in her hands. Her voice came back as she cried in pain. She screamed in anguish as she realized that the town was set ablaze before her, The scene was replaying itself before her eyes. She screamed for Zangan to help her as he pulled people from buildings but he couldn't hear her. She ignored the urge to scream as her eyes widened when something was coming from above. She did a sort of handspring backwards so that she could get a good look at her attacker. She gasped at who she saw. Heaven's dark Harbinger, Sephiroth, the nightmare. Partially paralyzed in fear, she shrieked as she ran towards the house. The door was reduced to splinters beneath the crushing force of her roundhouse kick. He was still behind her, a smile gracing his lips. She knew where she would go, she couldn't fight him alone, and so she would hide. She ran upstairs to the secret passage. It was already open. She rounded the corner and started to run down the spiraling staircase, but out of her peripheral vision she saw him coming at her. She let out a desperate scream as she stumbled backwards. Caught on the precipice she teetered for a minute, decided that a death from a floor was better than death by sword anyways, and then fell over backwards down the middle of the staircase. Her mane of hair trailing behind her, she reached out and caught her hand on the edge of the staircase. She didn't catch herself but it maneuvered her into the right position to land on her feet. _

_A huge shock went through her body as she felt her feet hit the ground. She launched herself backward as Sephiroth landed where she would have been a second ago. He smiled and launched himself at her. There was no escape now. _

_She felt her breath escape as he hit her in the gut with the hilt or his masamune. She smashed into a book case sending books toppling down around her. Breathing heavily, she anchored herself with her hands and pushed herself up and flew towards the lab at the other end of the hallway. Sighing as she accepted her all too soon death, she stopped and turned in the doorway with her fists clenched. He was flying at her with his sword raised. She resigned herself as she closed her eyes as she waited for the impact. Bang! _

_But...that wasn't the impact she was waiting for. Unconsciously thinking that he may have somehow ran her trough without her feeling it, her eyelids crept open revealing that Sephiroth was pressed against the wall; hand clenched over the bullet would in the middle of his chest. She was puzzled but then she felt a warm presence from behind her. Feeling so much relief, she spun around to stare Vincent Valentine in his crimson eyes. Tifa felt tears well up in her eyes in relief as he simply reached out his human hand and pulled her up against him into his chest._

Tifa's shrill shriek filled the air as she awoke with a start. She was tangled in her sheets and her hair. She had dried tears on her face and she was clammy. There was more to her dream but that was all she could remember.

She looked over and squinted at the harsh morning sun in her eyes. There was an orange glow cast over everything giving it a somehow eerie look of serenity. Tifa debated the meaning of her dream and then leaned over to look at the clock, to her dismay the red block letters read 11:34 am. She was behind schedule; she would have to be out of the city on a chocobo in a half an hour is she wanted too be through the swamp before dark. She flung herself out of bed before her legs had time to realize what was going on and retreat back to the warm blankets.

Tifa scanned herself in the mirror, and after running a brush through her hair and deciding that she would put her hair in a ponytail; she put on her black short skirt and tank top. Deciding against her "shit kickers" she threw on her converse and picked up her bag to sling it over her shoulder.

Humming a tune as she shoved all the liquor from the cooler into her bag, she walked out the door and down the hall where she grabbed a cranberry muffin from the lunch cart and then made her way down the stairs. She thanked the innkeeper on the way out and then stepped into the sunlight and strolled down the brightly lit street. Her feet carried her to the end of the street before a large black man—probably left over from the night scene—stepped out in front of her with his few friends behind him.

"Can I help you?" Tifa asked, her voice flecked with annoyance.

The man looked back at his friends. "Yeah we were just wondering if we could uh...give you a ride anywhere." He asked with a suggestive smirk on his face. "Ha," She laughed, this is why she hated edge. "No, I'll be fine I think." Tifa said chuckling between words. She went to walk around him but he stepped in front of her almost falling over himself.

"Don't be like that." He said moving to grab her elbow.

He was clearly drunk, along with his little posse. "No, I don't think so." Tifa said calmly, quickly sidestepping his small lunge. He was seemingly enraged by this because he yelled and made a move to strike her. No wonder that she never saw the women of edge out past six without a group.

Tifa grabbed his wrist, sidestepped him and then slammed one of her converse clad feet into his back and pushing on the back of his elbow, slamming him into the pavement. "What, is that all?" She asked him with a smirk, still keeping her eyes on his posse.

"You're breaking my arm!" He yelled, disregarding her question.

"Oh, that's not true." She said rolling her eyes. "This is breaking your arm" Tifa drawled, pushing his arm into an awkward position, still not actually breaking it.

Once she heard the satisfying scream, she let him go and kicked him on the the ground. She had a sort of sense of accomplishment as she walked away, knowing that the chances were good that he wouldn't try that again any time soon. She meandered down towards the chocobo chorale and enjoyed the sun on her face as she walked down the street. She looked into the weapon shop window and marveled at the fighting gloves. She had sold her God's Fist a long time ago and she sorely wished that she had brought more money. She spotted the chorale in the reflection of the window and mentally said goodbye to the gloves.

She anxiously stoked the smooth surface of her materia as she waited for a chocobo to be brought around. 'What would she do at Nibelhiem?' she thought to herself, kicking at the floor with her boot. Well, visit her father and mother's grave, obviously. Maybe she would climb mount Nibel. She didn't know for certain, but that was where she needed to start, that much she was sure of.

The chocobo gave a kweh from behind her as its handler scratched the feathers on the back of its neck.

"She's all yours, her name's Miakis." He said with a definite pat on the bird's back.

"Thank you," Tifa said handing him the gil.

"please come again!" He called after her as she led Miakis to the city limits.

She hopped on the chocobo's back as soon as she passed the "Leaving Edge" sign. She ushered the bird forward with her heels so to make it run faster. It was a nice feeling, to have the wind whip around her, no real care in the world, that is until the sun had settled behind the mountains with the swamp barley in her view.

"We'll stop and you'll eat when we get to the swamp," Tifa whispered into Miakis' ear. As if she understood, Miakis gave a kweh and ran full tilt for the swamp.

"That's a good girl." Tifa said, a smile flashing on her face.

Had Miakis not dodged, they both probably would have been dead. The Giant snake had come straight out of the ground beneath them and Miakis, like the chocobo sent from the gods, stopped and propelled backwards.

Tifa let a small yelp of surprise out as she smacked into the back of Miakis' neck. She looked at the giant monster. She remembered them from her days of traveling with her friends. It had taken all of them just to take it down; Tifa was in a deal of trouble. She may be able take it though, but she could only hope that Miakis would stay while she was fighting. She climbed off Miakis

"Stay. Please?" Miakis stood where she was and with a triumphant smile Tifa ran at the scaly monster.

Jumping into the air she used her fire materia to burn its face. The vile creature writhed and lashed out violently, its full body now out of its hole. Tifa took a swinging kick at the creature's head when it came close enough to her for her to do so. The snake, caught off guard, recoiled and lashed out its monstrous tail and struck Tifa, knocking her flying. Gasping for air, Tifa rolled over and got to her knees before getting up. She raised her hand high in the air and the materia glowed. The sky darkened with clouds as the dragon raced down from the center. Tifa ran to steady Miakis as the dragon raised its read and a blue glow appeared in its mouth. The blue light cast a sinister shadow over everything and then...bang. The snake writhed and coiled before dying.

Tifa sighed a breath of relief when the dragon disappeared but then took a sharp breath in as she realized what grave danger they were in. She felt the vibrations of the other snakes beneath her feet as she hopped onto Miakis.

"Yah!" she yelled as Miakis shot towards the cave opening in the distance. Jumping over plants and rocks the cave opening became closer and closer. Tifa looked behind her and to her dismay there were two more snakes in the distance, gaining ground on them fast. "C'mon girl, almost there!"

Miakis gave a nervous warble as they grew closer still. The snake struck out at Miakis, "Jump Mia!" She yelled. Miakis gave a short hop and as the snake's head slid under them in its miss, Miakis used it to jump towards the cave.

They were in darkness of the underground pass instantly. Miakis' sudden startled halt caused Tifa to fly to the ground and hit her head unconscious.

_Note: There, didn't I tell you that the chapters would get longer? I think my writing skills are improving in the middle of my doing this. I haven't wrote a story or fanfic in a LONG time, just my damned science papers. Okay, this little note does have a point to it though, and that is this; my word processing program is down so I've been using notebook so soory for any spelling/grammatical errors, yeah, sad huh? __TT __Well Whatever. Life is handing me lemons so__I'm gonna__make me a long island iced tea. Wait...no that's not right. Whatever, I'll just bite em' after a swig o' Tequila. Just kidding, I hate tequila. But I can make a mean Pain in the Ass. (That's strawberry and rum if you don't know.)_


	5. Chapter 5: Accident

Chapter 5

Tifa awoke with a giant head and back ache. She felt like she had a hangover and she noticed that her face was buried in something soft and yellow. Tifa got to her knees to see a very happy chocobo looking at her from it's curled up position beside her.

"I swear to the gods that I will feed you all you want when we get to the next town. But for now this will have to do." Tifa said as she pulled some greens in plastic wrap from her bag and handed them to her. Miakias happily ate seemingly unaware that they were in a long, dark damp cave. Tifa decided it was time to leave.

"Let's go sweetie," Tifa said standing up and walking to the light at the end of the tunnel, beckoning Miakis to follow. Miakis got up and followed her. As they stepped into the radiant light, she realized that it was probably only 10-ish and they had plenty of time.

After only 10 minutes of riding on Miakis, the ghost town of Nibelhiem appeared on the horizon. Tifa took a deep breath and ushered Miakis forward.

It seemed like the sun had not moved at all when they stepped into Nibelhiem. Tifa dismounted from Miakis and looked around at all the ragtag houses and smiled somewhat. She led Miakis to the old stables and tied her on a long rope so that she could still wander a bit. Tifa gazed upon her's and cloud's houses. No she didn't want to go there, to many memories. She did, on the other hand, want to go to the cemetery. She wandered through town to the graveyard that Nibelhiem manor overlooked. She walked to the Lockhart family plot and knelt by her parent's graves.

"Hey mom, dad." She said allowed. "Did you miss me? Because I certainly missed you. I wish you were here now, I need you, or someone I can trust. I feel so alone in the world right now. I was with cloud so long that I lost my place with Barret and...I-I'm...scared." She felt tears well up in her eyes. "When did I become so weak?" She asked the air. "I-I just wanted to make everyone happy but, but then I just couldn't take being ignored any longer." Tifa looked at her hands in her lap for a while. "Stupid, unreliable cloud, always making it difficult for those around him."

"Sorry," She apologized to the graves. "I guess I came here to find out what I need to do with myself...thanks for listening." Tifa laughed at herself.

After Tifa had untied Miakis, she sat in the grassy fields of the graveyard and she ate some of her reserves. She couldn't help but notice the mansion after she was done and had nothing to distract herself with. It was just to fascinating to pass up, she had to take a look inside. She felt like a child watching a scary movie, no matter how scared she was she just felt compelled to watch. It was the same situation here.

She left Miakis in the front yard to wander as she opened the heavy wooden doors. The entire floor was covered in dirt and grime, but that was not what she was looking at. As soon as she had walked in, she noticed something shiny, black and glossy from a room upstairs. She felt compelled to go to it. She strode across the creaky wooden floor and up the stairs to a room on her right where to her surprise, the light from a window reflected light off the black grand piano. Not just any but _her_ grand piano. She didn't care how it go there but she felt like she was going to cry. She had remembered when she had gotten that. Her parents were both alive and they loved to hear her play at her piano teachers so they decided that Tifa needed a piano if her own. The only thing Tifa did for a month afterwards was play that piano. This was perhaps the most meaningful item that she knew of that could so accurately represent her childhood before it took a turn for the worse. She ran her hand across the black, smooth surface. She sat down at the wooden stool and placed her hands on the keys.

"Let's see here." Tifa mumbled through joyful tears. It all flooded back to her as she started to play. E, G, C...B, G, D...E, G, C, B, D, C, A, B, G...D... She started to sway back and forth, lost in her happy memories. _Thump. _She heard a loud thump from down the hall and _All _the hairs on her arms and neck stood on end. Tifa got up and ran. From the top of the stairs she saw the main door starting to open and she bolted down the hallway. She heard someone coming down the hallway and she pressed herself against the brick wall behind her.

"Who's there!" Came a yell and she pushed further against the wall. Tifa felt a click of a latch. Before she realized what was going on, it was to late. The brick wall swung open behind her and she stumbled backward over the edge of the stairs and fell.

_Note: Sorry about this chapter, I wrote it at 2 in the morning because the idea came to me in a dream and I felt I needed to right it down RIGHT NOW! lol_


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

A.N/ Hey guys, I really appreciate your...let's see here...1,2 reviews! Sorry that I didn't update for a while, I had spring break and well, school is the only place I can get wireless for my laptop. Oh, and I also have a warning for some of my easily offended readers. This story may later have a tad bit of lemon, a little! So as soon as the rating changes to M, you'll know what has happened. But that—if it happens—probably won't see the light of day for a while. Ha ha, I'm a grade 11 girl so I guess you could consider me slightly young to write lemon, but hey at least I'm not some 36 year old balding man whose idea of a Friday night is sitting in his basement playing mahjong with mommy and her seven cats...wow. Anyways, here you go.

Chapter 6

Tifa's eyelid's fluttered open to find herself lying in soft bed with jet black bedspread and hurting all over.

"What the hell?" She thought aloud. She went to push herself up and screeched with pain as her wrist, arm, fingers and ankle felt like they had just been crushed. She remembered falling. "Oh god, where am I?" Tifa used her stomach muscles to get up and used one foot to hop and one hand to steady herself against the door frame. "Hello? Anyone?" She yelled into the blackness, there were no lights. She was alone and she didn't care who it was but she didn't want to be alone anymore. She was scared to be alone in the pitch blackness. She couldn't even see her own hands in front of her face. She started in back up to sit down on the bed that was there behind her.

"Tifa." Came a voice from behind her.

Giving a scream of sheer terror, she lost her grip on the doorframe and went toppling backwards. She was caught in a strong vice like grip. She fought against her attacker, hitting him with both hands even when the injured one screamed at her to stop.

"Tifa! It's me." Came a low quiet voice that waited for her response.

"V-Vincent?" She asked feeling or a cloak around his neck. Sure enough, there it was. She touched his forehead like a blind person to feel for the bandana, there it was. He almost dropped her as he flinched away from her touch though.

"Why is it so dark Vincent?" She asked a little frantically, still breathing heavily as she tightly clutched Vincent's cloak in between her fingers.

"I was sleeping in a chair over here." he said. "hold on." He half carried her over to the bed and sat her down. Without warning the soft glow of an oil lamp filled the room. Yep, it was Vincent alright, just as tall and raven haired as ever. She could barely make out his face through her squinting, but it was him. How can you sleep in complete blackness...in a chair none the less?" She asked him, her hand throbbing.

"Well...I can see perfectly well in the dark and you are in my bed." He said in a monotonous voice.

"Oh," Tifa said, a little flushed. "So I am...so where are we?"

"...In the basement of the manor."

"Well...how did I get here and...what happened to me? I can't quite remember."

"You fell down the stairs Tifa; I think I startled you pretty badly. And I carried you here."

Tifa's face became colored again, Vincent must think her pretty dumb to be shocked enough to fall down a flight of stairs. She was a little guilty as she felt like a huge burden. He not only had to carry her but he also had to sleep in a chair as he watched her. "Sorry Vincent." Tifa cringed, looking up at him through her tangled mane of hair.

Vincent sighed at her unnecessary apology. "There is no need to apologize Tifa. I do not mind," said Vincent with an ever so rare hint of sincerity in his voice.

"Thank you Vincent."

"...You are welcome...are you hungry?"

"Huh? Oh...no, not really," she lied. "But if you have some water...?" Tifa asked hopefully.

"Consider it done." Vincent said as he started walking out of the room.

"Vincent...?" she asked.

"Yes Tifa?" He asked turning his head slightly

"Could...could you please turn on some more lights, that is, if you have any?"

Vincent saw her trembling in the dim, flickering light, she reminded him of a small girl right at that moment. She was so afraid of the dark and being alone. Vincent Nodded his head. "I will bring down another lamp for you." Without waiting for her response, Vincent strode into the darkness, his demonic eyes making his vision as clear as daylight for him.

Tifa sat alone in the dark with her knees hugged to her chest. She fought back the tears that welled in her eyes. She wasn't crying over being alone in the dark, no. She was crying over her life in general. She was abandoned by the man she loved, cast into an unfamiliar world. She had broken, as far as she could tell, wrist, forearm and a couple fingers her ankle was also nice and swollen. She was also stuck in the dark confines of Mr. Valentine's house. She was grateful to him for saving her, she would be stranded if not for him, but she had always been kind of frightened of him. Her survival instincts had always screamed in protest when she was near him and she partially believed Yuffie's theory that Vincent was really a vampire.

Vincent—with his keen scenes—could hear Tifa's quiet sobs as he came down the stairs with the oil lamp in one hand and a glass of water in the other. He knew very well that she would much rather be with Cloud than stuck here with him. Vincent didn't mind though, he was used to people staying away from him, flinching when he took a step towards them or jumping when their shoulder would brush against Vincent's as he walked by. Still, her whimpers pulled at his heartstrings somewhat, he could at least ask her what was bothering her could he not?

Vincent used his elbow to push open the door and saw Tifa quickly wipe away her tears. He handed her the water. He waited as she downed the whole thing and then asked, "Tifa...may I ask...what is bothering you?" It's not that he didn't care about what was bothering her; it's just that he had never been comfortable with other people's emotions or problems, after being locked in a box for thirty years, one starts to lose their humanity.

"It's nothing, you wouldn't want to hear it anyways," she responded, without actually meaning what she said. He could tell that she wanted to unload on him. He really didn't want to get involved in it but when he thought back to all the times that Tifa had watched Vincent's back in battle, he couldn't help but feel obligated to listen to her.

"Ms. Lockhart, I, as far as I know, have the rest of time to listen to you." Vincent responded.

Tifa gave a small smirk she had zero idea what he meant buy that. She decided that she could talk to him as he was probably the only person she knew who, for the most part, would just listen. "Well..." she started. "I guess it started a while ago when Cloud stated acting strangely, he started talking to himself, wandering around in the middle of the night aimlessly, you know. Anyways, one day he just stood up from his seat and said he was leaving to find her." She tried to stop her tears but failed miserably. She just started venting now. "It's not fair!" She yelled at nothing. "I tried so hard Vincent, I really did. I tried to make him better, I gave him all I had and I thought that he had started to heal... I thought that by being with him and showing him that I wasn't going to disappear on him, that he would feel better and come to see that his life didn't die with...her." She paused and then said in a quiet voice, "I...I really thought that he loved me, Vincent."

Though he didn't show the full extent of it, Vincent truly felt empathetic for her. "Tifa...I know what that's like."

"You, you do?" She asked, surprised between sobs.

"Yes, when you are hopelessly in love with someone but they... _'mislead you and string you along until they have gotten all that they can out of you and then rip your heart out of your chest and show it to you'_...do not return your feelings." Vincent sat beside her.

Tifa took another swig of water and wiped her face. "I'm sorry Vincent I just...needed to talk to somebody and I'm sure your bedroom wall wouldn't have provided such useful insight.

Vincent smirked. "It is alright Tifa. You were...just venting."

Tifa was slightly shocked at what he had just said to her. To her experience with him, in all that was a week's worth o' Vincent dialogue, plus the fact that he opened a little to give her a small amount of insight to his psyche.

Vincent stood up, "Tifa, you should rest. Just call if you need anything, I will be down the hall." He turned to leave. In truth, he was feeling slightly awkward after telling her that tidbit from his past. He knew Tifa was not one to pry but he just generally didn't like people knowing things about him. After what Hojo had done to him he didn't want to give _anyone_ an opportunity to poke around in his psyche ever again.

"Thanks, Vincent. So...you'll be right down the hall?" Tifa asked trying to disguise her obvious nervousness. She had always hated and somewhat feared the mansion, and that fear only ever got worse when she was alone in it.

"Yes," Replied Vincent. He was actually going to the ground floor of the house for a round of pest control but he would be able to hear her from anywhere in the house and wasn't about to scare her.

Vincent had a hard time understanding why someone would be afraid of the dark. He always liked the dark, it made him feel better when he could not be seen by prying eyes, but then again, after being locked in a box for 30 years, one grows accustomed to the dark.

"Okay, thank you, and...I'm sorry Vincent." said Tifa looking at the barely seeable floor.

Vincent was almost annoyed with her, she had always used to apologize for nothing, it was almost as if she felt bad for breathing your air some of the times. "There is nothing to apologize for Tifa; I have plenty of room here for you to stay."

"Thank you.." Tifa repeated, looking up at Vincent through her long bangs.

"Think nothing of it," replied Vincent right before turning and walking into the inky blackness.

AN/ hey guys, what'd you think? I thought it was pretty good; I had my self a little bit of a laugh when Tifa turns around and smacks into Vinny. So, review, please? I appreciate CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. During the long hours where I am doing homework or fanfics, I eat reviews to keep me alive. Oo


	7. Chapter 7

AN/ hey people, how's things

AN/ hey people, how's things? I just figured I'd tell you something about myself and my writing because it's a Saturday and I'm feeling chipper today regardless of the fact that I work tomorrow. While I'm writing I HAVE to be listening to music or else I have zero train of thought. I just can't listen to songs with words in them or I get distracted and unconsciously start writing out the words of the song. So right now I'm listening to Don't be Afraid from Final fantasy VIII. Yeah, you know you're cool when huh?

Chapter 7

Tifa awoke with a start as a plate was plunked down on the nightstand beside her. She looked at it for a moment still mystified as to where it had come from.

"You can eat that with one hand." said Vincent from the chair in the corner, making Tifa jump.

"Thanks Vincent." she said groggily, picking up the sandwich.

Vincent gave her a nod and returned to the book that he was reading. Vincent had an affinity for books. That and chocolate, Vincent loved chocolate, of course no one else knew that. That just wouldn't be very 'Vincent' of him.

Vincent stole a glance at Tifa and was rather shocked. Being a woman of rather shapely beauty, he was surprised to see her cramming the sandwich into her mouth like an snake with it's jaw unhinged. He was thankful for the dim light or else she would have seen the grin that was plastered on his face.

After a long pause and an even longer time after the sandwich, Tifa asked Vincent. "What're you reading?"

Damn, Vincent hadn't thank that she would ask. "Nothing." Was the best answer he could give.

Tifa frowned "Come now Vincent, it's obvious that you're reading something. What is it?" She asked leaning forward towards Vincent, curious as to why he was so reluctant to tell her.

Vincent sighed, seeing that she wouldn't take no for an answer. "I'm reading Gone with the Wind." said Vincent with a sigh, almost feeling as if he lost.

"I've never read it, I've never even heard about it, what's it about?"

Right there was the question that he didn't want to have to answer, so he did the only logical think tried to dance around the fact he was reading a love story. "I'm not surprised that you have not, it was written long before even _my_ time and I think this is probably one of the only copies from here to Midgar."

"What do you mean, 'your time'?" She asked with her head slightly cocked to one side.

"Miss Lockhart, do you...not know how old I am?"

"Um...27?" She asked not quite sure what that was really supposed to mean.

"Try 57," Vincent said woodenly, waiting to gauge her reaction.

"...that was my next guess." said Tifa, making Vincent laugh the tiniest bit. "What do you mean 57?"

" It's because of Hojo's experiments, I've been 27 for the last 31 years." Vincent said with an iron resolve not to go into detail over the experiments. Tifa must have picked up on this because she just said "That's awful." and then left it alone.

"Hey Vincent, I guess there are no windows anywhere down here hey?" She asked hopefully after a long pause.

"No, there aren't, I suppose you require sunlight do you not?" Vincent asked totally serious. His body had been built by Hojo, specifically with the purpose of being used as a reusable test subject, thus he had been built so as he would not require vitamin D for his long stay in the dark basement.

"No, not really, I'll be okay, or at least until this sprain heals, it's not to bad just a stretch I think. I won't be able to run for a while but I think in a few days I'll be fit to hobble around." She said gesturing to her ankle.

"I'm sorry I have no materia to handle that. As you know I wasn't the main user of the healing Materias to begin with and yours broke when you fell." apologized Vincent, pointing to the slots of her "God's Fist" on the nightstand where her mastered Cure materia had previously sat. "I can assist you up the stairs if you would like." said Vincent, offering his human hand to her.

If it was any other circumstance, Tifa would have politely declined, but she really hated being in the dark. "Would you mind?" She asked using her bangs again as a sort of shield from his crimson gaze.

He would really rather not as he had always been weary of people touching him, but since she was a cripple and needed his help, he would. "Not at all Miss Lockhart." Vincent leaned forward and took her uninjured hand in his and lifted her off the bed.

"Thanks Vincent I think I can—whoa what're you doing!?"

Vincent put his human hand behind her back and tipped her back to sweep her up under the knees with his metal one, ever so careful not to cut her thigh with his sharp talons.

"You don't need to carry me; I would just need some help up the stairs..." Tifa said, not quite sure what to do with her hands.

"Miss Lockhart, you and I both know that you would have hurt yourself going up the stairs."

"No, really," said Tifa squirming in Vincent's strong hold. "I'd be fine."

"It would be in your best interest to stop squirming, you'll cut yourself" Vincent wiggled the fingers on his claw to draw her attention to them. "and if I make you uncomfortable though, I'll put you down."

"No, no! I didn't mean that, I'm sorry." said Tifa frantically.

"That's alright Miss Lockhart," Vincent sighed. Tifa was always apologizing for everything. Even when she thought there was a slim chance she hurt someone's feelings, she would say she's sorry. She always tried to please everyone, she couldn't stand the thought that someone might be angry at her. On this level, she somewhat irritated him.

Tifa marveled at how swiftly and soundlessly Vincent ascended the stairs with her in his arms. He took her up the stairs and down the hall from the piano room, to a room she hadn't noticed. The room had a grand window that faced the mountain, underneath which sat a large red couch. There was a long wooden table in front of the couch and shelves lined with heavily aged books up against the walls.

"Hold on." Vincent said to her. He used his claw hand to reach around her knees and into his cloak where she heard a quiet ringing. He flipped open his phone right after looking at the caller ID and sighing. "Hello." Tifa almost laughed as she heard a muffled "_Hey Dracula! You're awake at this time of day? Shouldn't you be hiding in a coffin?"_

"Oh yeah Cid, _that's_ a good one." said Vincent flatly, rolling his eyes. "To the point I see." ... "Yes, I know where she is"... "Yes, I could but then that would take the fun out of you guessing."... "No"... "No"... "Alright, Cid, there is no need to yell. She's here."... "No, Cid, I'm looking right at her now."... "No I didn't kidnap her to suck her blood."... "Oh, no Cid, if I suddenly turned into a vampire, _trust me_, you would be the first one to find out."... "Yes, she just fell down the stars in the mansion. She's pretty much okay though."... "Yes I know...wait, is Cloud there?"... "Good."... "None of your business."... "Of course I'll bring her. Yes Cid, I'm going to leave her in the mansion with a sprained ankle to hobble around and do some occasional pest control."... "Okay Cid I'll tell her."... "Alright, goodbye Cid." Vincent flipped his phone closed and realized Tifa was staring at him. Vincent moved towards the couch and laid her down.

"Thanks Vincent."

"You're welcome." He said, shifting to his other foot. "That was Cid, he wants our help with an investigation."

"What do you mean by investigation?" Inquired Tifa curiously.

"We've been hired by Reeve at WRO to check out the mako eruptions that have been occurring lately. It's a remnant of the life stream that destroyed Meteor. When the lifestream burst from the planet's core, it compromised the structural Integrity of the planets crust. That much we know, our job is to go to the forgotten capital. That is where the eruptions are occurring most frequently. Reeve thinks that there may be a problem there.

"How many of avalanche will be there?"

Vincent thought for a moment. "You and I, Cid, Barret, Nanaki and...Yuffie..." he gave an annoyed sigh with the last name mentioned. "No, Cloud will not be there."

"Oh, okay...When are we going?" Tifa asked, not wanting to linger on the subjecy lest she get all teary eyed.

"We leave for Rocket town on Friday, by that time I'll have gone to get some cure materia for you and you'll be able to fight and walk and run."

"That's okay Vincent, you don't have to do that for me, I'm sure I can borrow some From Yuffie, And besides, it's only for a little longer." said Tifa, knowing how incredibly expensive materia was nowadays.

"I have to go to Rocket tomorrow anyways to get provisions, so I might as well. I need cure materia for the trip anyways"

Tifa knew she was just making excuses for herself but she agreed. "Alright."

Vincent gave her a nod and turned and left, leaving Tifa on the couch to look out the window.

So they would have the rest of today, and tomorrow before they had to leave for Rocket town on Friday morning. It wasn't long before Tifa had drifted into sleep in the sunlight.

AN/ God, I'm sorry for the boring chapter, I just wasn't feeling to up to writing a lot today. Teh next one will be better, promise. I guess I just keep wanting to skip ahead to where the real story starts to begin. Fine, I guess I can give you a hint. The real good part of the story will start to rear it's hear in two chapters.He


	8. Chapter 8

AN/ Next Chapter is the chapter where they leave for the forgotten city

AN/ wow, long chapter. Next Chapter is the chapter where they leave for the forgotten city. So...yeah. By the way, when I refer to a song played later on the piano, just imagine it to be flowers blooming in the church, because that was what I was listening to while I was writing that.

Chapter 8

Vincent left in the middle of the night, he wasn't sleeping anyways. He would prefer it of he was back by 11ish so that he could heal Tifa before he had to help her to the bathroom again. No matter how many times he lifter her of helped her up, he always flinched when she touched him. He absentmindedly pushed the gil to the man behind the counter after the grocer had bagged them. His thumb stroked the smooth surface of the new materia in his hand as he walked out of town.

.:x:.

Tifa thought she was hearing things when she heard music. She cracked open her eyes and looked out the window at the sunset. Was it really that late? She paid the length of her slumber no mind and returned her attention to the music coming from down the hall. It was the grand piano, she felt as though she could almost feel the slow peaceful melody in her core. Somehow the song made her happy, just made her feel uplifted.

Without thinking, she swung her feet of the couch and awaited the shock of pain from her ankle. To her surprise there was none, not only that but her wrist and arm was fine as well. _'Okay, I guess I am dreaming.' _Tifa concluded to herself in her head. She pushed herself off the couch, still leery that pain would shoot through her at any moment. Once she assured herself that this was a dream and she would be fine to walk, she took her first steps forward and out the doorway to behold the golden-orange light that was cast over the entrance hall. She turned and walked down the hall to the piano room, stubbing her toe on the doorway. _'This is a dream right?' _she asked herself as she continued forward, disregarding the throb in her toe.

Tifa came to the doorway of the piano room, carefully peering around the corner. Her eyes widened in surprise to see Vincent sitting with his most of his back to her playing the piano. She noted that his eyes looked softer; his whole demeanor seemed far less hard and cold that she was used to. His fingers, both metallic and human floated eloquently above the ivories, drifting back and forth from key to key, hitting every one with precision and accuracy. It seemed that he was at ease, not thinking of anything while he played, totally focused of the task at hand but at the same time, off in his own world. He seemed quite happy. He was without his cloak and headband so she could actually see the smile gracing his lips. Vincent looked far better smiling than he did frowning. He looked so serene and perfect in the amber glow of the sunset.

She stood there and listened for a bit and then, with a lot of hesitation, she walked up to him. She was afraid that the whole illusion would be shattered if she approached him, and it did. Vincent regained his stiff appearance and stopped playing as she sat down beside him.

"No!" Tifa said a little too loudly, "Please don't stop playing." She pleaded with him.

Vincent looked at her and saw how she wanted him to continue. "Very well miss Lockhart." Vincent replaced his hands on the keys and resumed playing.

Tifa folded her hands in her lap beside him and listened. She more just looked at him and it was making him uncomfortable. Was she angry with him? Maybe it was because he left so early. No, Tifa wasn't one to hold a grudge like that. But then, why was she looking at him like that?

"Vincent, that...that's beautiful, where did you learn that?" Tifa asked him dreamily.

Vincent's brow became knitted. His mother had taught him to play the piano. She was gone and playing the piano had always made him sad. "My mother taught me this song," said Vincent smiling lightly "I don't know how I remembered it after all these years..." Vincent's smile fell into a bitter frown. It brought back painful memories for him.

"Vincent, are you...okay?" Tifa asked. She reached out her hand and placed it on his shoulder.

Vincent didn't flinch away. "Yes Tifa, I'm...alright."

Tifa smiled a little as she realized that that was the first time he had called her Tifa instead of Miss Lockhart. "Vincent, would you like to tell me about her?" Tifa thought this might make him feel better, every time she would talk about her mom, she would feel better instead of wanting to cry.

"She..." Vincent began "was the one of only two people in my childhood who was truly kind to me." Vincent sighed. "She was an object of happiness and gentle kindness while my father...was an object of hatred and abuse." Vincent cringed at the thought of his father.

"What...happened to her?" Tifa asked, squeezing his shoulder a little.

"She, died...my father killed her." Vincent said looking at Tifa.

"Oh my god Vincent, I'm sorry." Tifa said looking back into his vermillion eyes.

"No Miss Lockhart, there's nothing for you to be sorry for, I told you of my own accord."

Tifa was in much disbelief that she had managed to get more than a few words out of him to notice that he had reverted to calling her 'Miss Lockhart'. "Thanks Vincent." She said with a smile on her face. Tifa got up and went to walk out of the room. Tifa stopped in the doorway. She turned around and put her arms gently around Vincent from behind. She smiled at the fact that Vincent's body didn't go rigid at her touch and she gave him a squeeze before pulling away.

Vincent was utterly shocked. Why she would say thank you to him after he had made her feel bad, he could not wrap his head around in the least. What mystified him even more though is why on earth did she bring herself to touch him? Vincent almost laughed at himself. He lifted his prosthetic to his face to look at it. Yes she was able to get past the fact that his left hand was a misshapen claw, but if she knew what he had done in the past, surely she would not even look at him.

Even so, that still left the fact on _why_ she had hugged him. Again, Vincent almost laughed at himself. He was reading too much into it. That was just a regular gesture of friendship that regular people make. Certainly not something that he had ever made a habit of, but normal people like Tifa seemed to do that a great deal...right?

./\/\/\:.

Tifa sat in the kitchen looking through the near bear cupboards, looking for food while contemplating what she had done not 20 minutes ago. Tifa sighed at her own stupidity. Vincent Valentine _hated_ physical contact and knowing him that little physical gesture would probably sent him back into the post-coffin days where he would just stand in the corner like a mute and observe everything you do. "Look what you've done Tifa," she said to herself. "You do realize that whatever comes next is your own fault, right stupid?" she asked herself, almost waiting for a response.

"What, did you break something?" asked Vincent from behind her, making Tifa jump about a foot in the air. No matter how much he liked Tifa, making her jump gave him endless entertainment.

"Oh no, just taking to myself," said Tifa. As she said this, she realized that she sounded like a child who had just been caught doing something its parents had told it not to.

Looking at Vincent through her bangs, she realized that he still had not donned his usual attire and lacked the covering of his cloak and headband. She had—besides in the piano room—never actually seen him without it. He gave him the quickest eye over so that he wouldn't notice. His jet black hair framed his ivory skin perfectly and his button up shirt didn't do much to hide his lean, muscular frame. He had translucent white skin with a clean shave. Tifa hated it when men had a five o'clock shadow. Barret liked to sport facial hair and it bothered her. She would go to hug him and the side of his face would always scrape on the side of hers. Tifa snapped back into reality as Vincent asked her if she was looking for food.

"I am, do you have any?" she asked not realizing how stupid the question was until it had escaped her mouth.

Vincent looked at her flatly. "Well, of course, I can't very well live on nothing Miss Lockhart." said Vincent, gesturing to the fridge as he sat at the table only a few feet away.

After selecting the milk and a peach, Tifa sat down across from Vincent. "Do you have a glass for this?" she asked, giving the milk a shake.

"My apologies Miss Lockhart, but I do not, I have become accustomed to living by myself I'm afraid."

"Well then, it seems we have a problem." said Tifa giving Vincent a smirk.

"Well it _is_ in a carton Miss Lockhart." replied Vincent while giving her an ever so rare smile.

_'Duh," _she thought to herself while taking a swig.

"Hey Vincent?" she asked, her annoyance getting the better of her. "Would you do me a small favor?"

He looked at her with a hurtful scrutiny. "I suppose that depends of the nature of the favor." he said raising an eyebrow to her.

"Fine," she said "Can you pleeeeease stop calling me Miss Lockhart and start calling me Tifa?"

"I suppose I could do that...but only if you will do me a small favor as well." he said to her.

Tifa sighed upon the situation she had just brought down upon herself. "Okay, what is it?"

Vincent took a deep breath. "Mi-Tifa, I want you to stop apologizing for everything, and...I want you to try not to revolve your life around pleasing other people, Tifa. You are always trying to be the backbone of things and I can see...that you are starting to crack under the pressure." Vincent looked at her, waiting to gauge her reaction. A lesser man would have closed his eyes and threw up his arms over his head in defense for the potential onslaught that was coming, but not Vincent, he sat there and quelled the urge to walk away right there.

Tifa furrowed her browed her brow as she thought about this, at first she thought that she was mad at him for making such an accusation but then sighed as she thought about it and realized that he was, in fact, right. "I...I guess you're right." she said quietly, looking at her fingers as they twisted together nervously in her lap.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of or anything like that, Tifa." He said to her truthfully." I just think that you put to much weight upon yourself.

"...Thanks, Vincent...I think I'll try that." she said looking up at him through her bangs.

_**./\/x\/\:.**_

Tifa looked up at the Moonlit night sky through her spot in the window. She sat there, looking at the full moon, her bare legs dangling out the window as she leaned back onto her hands. She loved the cool, crisp night air. She loved the inky blackness of the Night sky and the moon above mount Nibel, it reminded her of a white pearl that had been carefully placed upon black silk. God, she had missed this place. Even though it held some of her saddest memories, it also held her most precious childhood memories.

Tifa Inhaled deeply, and after deciding that she had had enough of the biting cold, she shut the window and walked down the hall to the kitchen. The draft gave her goose bumps and made Tifa wish that she had brought some other sleepwear than her knee length tee shirt.

_Tossing and turning…writhing in agony, the bed- no, the table- beneath him so hard and cold, like the surgical implements lying across his chest. Thick metal shackles were his restraining vices, and the crude tools laid out before him, his chest serving as their makeshift table, only served to mock him and clearly tell of what was coming. He had never known such a fear before in his life, but now everything was so uncertain. He couldn't remember…_

_One faint shot, the sound echoing over and over and growing louder each time._

…_That's right…but then how? Glaring beams of light shone down into his eyes and blurred his already waning vision. His blood began to run hot with dizziness, and yet he did not come even close to passing out._

"…_Because I want you awake for this…"_

_No voice left to scream with, he braced himself as he felt cold and icy knuckles dig into his ribs as they grasped the heavy tools. Things used to maim…things for butchering. His skin made sensitive to the lightest touch with chemicals and new plasmas- things he wasn't aware he even had yet- his eyes grew wide when the first cruel blade cut its way inside of his trembling body._

_He'd have screamed, but his vocal chords had been temporarily severed, in a half-completed attempt to accommodate a newer range that had yet to be added. His head shot back and his mind did all the screaming his fiery throat could not; his skull felt like it was going to bust open with the escalating pressure. He felt blood bubbling beneath his skin, in the hollow of his neck. Each sound of metal hitting metal, the implements rising and falling to the table next to him, one after the other as they were discarded and retrieved, threatened to drive him insane._

_His muscles tensed with each coming spasm as his exposed nerves were clipped and tweaked, disassembled and reconnected, and as they tensed, his bindings cut into his skin leaving bruises and scrapes, even breaking some of his skin. All of the pressure, building…rising…he thought he was going to burst, despite his chest cavity already being open. He could make out the blurs of red and white beneath him, but his head was so restrained that lying on his back, he could not see the events clearly. The only thing he could see, the only thing that lay ahead of him, was that bright and blinding surgical light that hung haplessly above his struggling form._

_He fought with every breath- fought against the pain, fought against his restraints, fought against each and every sharp prick and tearing. His eyes burned with tears and fury- and something else that he didn't quite yet recognize- but he could not hear his own screams, only the sharp intake and release of air coming from an open mouth, ripping through a half-open throat. He arched his back against the pain, the pain made so purposefully unbearable by the hands that made his poisons, until a hand reached out and forced its way inside his hollows…and broke something._

_There was a snap, and his body went limp._

_As time went on, each procedure became worse and worse. After the initial operation, even more chemicals were added, and the cuttings became fiercer as the wounds started to heal over. Loss of his life no longer a problem, his tormenter could break him…reshape him…in any way he wished._

_But those first scars would never leave him, forever there._

_Forever…a reminder._

Tifa yanked open the refrigerator door and popped open the milk. "I wonder how old this is" she asked herself aloud, taking a swig. She almost choked when she heard Vincent's unbearable, agonized scream. She dropped the carton to the floor and bolted down the hall, to the hidden staircase where she got half way down the long, round staircase before jumping down the center. She ignored the shock of pain up her legs as her bare feet took the impact of the landing, and sprinted to Vincent's room where the screams had become more pained. She got her first look at him from down the hall where she saw him from his bed. His brow knitted and his face contorted with pain, he had sweat all over his face and his bare chest. He was thrashing wildly and it was obvious to see that in his sleep he had cut not only his bed sheets and pillow to ribbons with his sharp claw, but he also had cut large gouges out of his chest and arms. His lower body was hopelessly tangled in the sheets. He would swing out with his claw at an unknown attacker and miss, and then he would get his claw caught in the cut sheets and accidentally rake his claw across his arm when he yanked it free. He was bleeding all over the bed and yet he still did not wake.

Tifa ignored the obvious physical danger to herself and flung herself over Vincent's chest in an attempt from keeping him from hurting himself. She wrapped her hands around his wrists and put her body weight on his chest. Vincent was incredibly strong though, even in his sleep and it took all she had just to hold on. His muscles tensed as he fought against her. He obviously thought that she was someone else. "Vincent! Vincent, wake up!" She screamed. His eyes snapped open, but he was still struggling, still half dreaming, reality crossed into his dream. He rolled and struggled against her, a look of primal, animal fear and look of survival flashed in his eyes. An unmistakable, insane glare.

Vincent showed some recognition and then screamed out as if she was far away rather that roght on top of him."Tifa! Help! Oh god Tifa, please don't let them take my other arm! Oh god! It hurts! God, please let me die!" He screamed, begging for his own death. He arched his back in pain as if someone had driven a stake into his chest. He let out another scream.

"Vincent, don't say that! Vincent, you're dreaming, you're-VINCENT!" She cried as she felt the sharp, painful impact. She fell against his chest, her cheek and hair became matted in Vincent's blood.

Vincent laid there for a good two minutes, looking up at the ceiling, his breathing haggard, before he actually became aware of what had happened. He took a deep breat and smelt his as well as Tifa's blood in the air. He looked up to find her on his chest, face down in his blood, her small hands tightly clasped around his wrists. He reached behind her and touched the bloody gashes in her back. They were from his claw. He felt her crying softly in agony into his chest. Ignoring the pain that racked his body, he sat up and pulled Tifa to him. _'What have I done?'_ he asked himself. _'She was trying to help me. She feared for my life. She was doing what she thought she had to do by saving me. And what do I do? I cut her open.'_

If Tifa didn't need his help right now, he would have climbed right back into his coffin. He untangled his legs from the sheets and then swung his legs over the edge of the bed with Tifa in his arms. Falling over the first time, he used all his strength to walk towards the long staircase. His pant legs stuck to his clammy, bloody skin as his legs almost buckled under him as he ascended the final round of the staircase.

Vincent felt hot, bitter tears running down his face as he wet a washcloth with lukewarm water. He bent down to Tifa and helped her lay on her stomach on the bathroom floor.

"Vincent, it hurts." she cried.

"I know Tifa, I'm sorry, I'll make it better." he said softly back to her trying to get her to stop crying. He cut open Tifa's nightgown halfway down the back so as not to compromise her modesty, and began to sponge away the blood. He was worried about infecting her with something. With all the DNA enhancements Hojo had made to Vincent, he couldn't help but worry that something in his blood might do Tifa harm. "This is going to sting for a minute Tifa, I'm sorry." She nodded in consent. He poured the Iodine out through the eyedropper into Tifa's wound. He sorely wished he had Hydrogen peroxide, or something less painful, but he didn't. He felt like killing himself after he heard her cry out again. He gathered all the dressing he had and began to tape a large square of gauze to her back.

After he was done, he gathered Tifa in his arms again and after regaining some of his strength, he jumped down the stairwell, landing soundlessly in the basement below. He walked to his room and placed her in a chair next to his bed. She watched him as he went through his drawer and pulled out the smallest, most comfortable pair of shorts and pants he could find and walked to Tifa with them. _'...How are we going to do this?'_ he thought, looking back and forth between the clothes and Tifa.

"I'll be fine Vincent," she mumbled.

"I'm sorry Tifa, but no matter how much you protest, I'm not letting you wear my blood any longer. Now then...um, tuck your arms inside your nightgown." he said. She obeyed and he pulled his shirt over her head. He walked around to the back and grasped the ripped fabric of her nightgown, pulling it over her head, out through the collar of the black tee shirt. "You can get those shorts on yourself...can you not?" he asked, examining the healing wound on his chest. He would heal by morning, she would not be so lucky.

"Yes I do believe I am quite capable, thank you very much." Tifa said, almost angry with him. She snatched the shorts from his hand and used the arm of the chair to help herself get up.

Vincent got up to stand outside the doorway. "Tell me when you're done Mi-Tifa." he said awkwardly.

"Alright..." she said, shooing him away with her hand. She gingerly clothed, trying her hardest not to pull on the dressings on her back. She sighed inwardly and thought for a minute. _'Why am I blaming Vincent? It was just an accident, right? Besides, I'll heal in no time.' _She thought to herself. "Alright, I'm done." she called to Vincent.

Vincent meandered into the room and immediately cut to the chase. "Tifa, I'm truly sorry. I'm not trying to justify myself but if you'll only allow me to explain..." Tifa raised her hand to stop him.

"Don't worry about it." she said cheerfully. "It was an accident right? It was my own fault anyways...and you're a lot worse off that I am right?"

"No, it wasn't your fault, it was mine." Vincent admitted with a guilty look an his face.

"Vincent, I was the one who jumped on you it was my-"

"No, don't say that. You were just trying to help. It was my fault, and while I'll heal by tomorrow morning, you'll still be recuperating next week. Tifa, I don't want you to blame youself and I also want you to know that I am sorry." He said, not being able to bring himself to look her in the eye.

Tifa furrowed her brow. "Maybe...you're the one who should stop apologizing." She said, looking at him.

He gave her a questioning look. "What do you mean?"

Tifa started to get slightly annoyed. She threw her hand down on the bed to make a point. "You think everyone's going to leave right?" She asked with a slightly raised voice.

"I don't follow you..."

"You're so afraid that if you set someone off in the least that they'll up and leave you. I can see it. You don't want to have to lose anyone, right? So you go off in the corner and detach yourself from people so you don't get hurt when they disappear. I can see it in you Vincent, that's what you used to do in AVALANCHE too!" She yelled.

Vincent didn't know where this was coming from, though she had hit the nail right on the head. "Tifa, are you alright?" he asked as her face began to grow red and tears welled up in the corners of her eyes.

"Yeah," she said with a sob. "It's just that's what Cloud did just before he left."

Vincent sighed, he wished Cloud could be here right now, but only so that he could strangle him. "Tifa, I am not Cloud." He said in a definite tone of voice.

"I know you're not, but you're so much like him. '_So much that it hurts._"

Vincent knew that Tifa wasn't really mad at him, more, she that she just missed Cloud. "Tifa, I know that you miss him, but you can't stress yourself out like this." said Vincent sitting down beside her.

"Vincent, I hate this...I really wish that thing could be the way they were, before _she _died." Tifa said, remembering the wonderful times she had spent with all her friends before they had gone to the temple of the ancients.

"I know Tifa," he said with downcast eyes. "I wish that things were back to the way they were before they signed me off to this damnable lab." said Vincent under his breath, so that Tifa couldn't hear, with clenched fists.

There was a long silence where Tifa had just sobbed and put her head on Vincent's shoulder, making him very uncomfortable. _'Would you get her off me?' _ Chaos questioned from inside his mind. _'Oh, you're back are you chaos? What a lovely surprise.' _Vincent said in his head. This was the demon's first appearance in days.

'_Aw, c'mon Vinny, I knew you missed me. I had me a nice long nap and now I think it's time to go on a killing spree! Whad'ja think Vinny, let's go up to the reactor and kick some monster ass!' _screamed chaos inside his mind.

'_I don't think so; especially not while Tifa's around.'_

'_Vincent, I know you want to, I can tell you know, I live inside this godforsaken thing you so eloquently call a brain after all.'_

_'No'_

_'It'd be fun, besides, we can bring her too! She'd make great bait you know.'_

_'I wish I could shoot you, you know that, Chaos?'_

_'Do it Vinny, I dare you, you'd just be blowin' your own fucking head open though.' _Vincent could hear chaos laughing at him on the inside.

Vincent gently pushed Tifa off him, "I need to get rid of my sheets, I will assist you up the stairs after."

Tifa's back felt like she had hot knives sticking into it. "Alright." she replied while struggling with all her strength to get out of the chair. She made a small grunting sound as she gave up and flopped back down into the chair. Drawing her knees to her chest, she watched Vincent with his task. She took a look at his chest and at the self inflicted wounds there. From the inch and a half gashes that they previously were, they had been reduced to narrow slices that were only about half an inch deep. This was amazing, there was no way that a normal person could heal that fast. This is what he must have meant when he said 'I'll heal by morning,' but this was impossible! How could he heal so fast? Tifa realized that the rest of the wounds on his torso, save the deep gashes that had been left on his right arm, had healed over completely. Tifa felt a sudden wave of fatigue wash over her. _'I'll just rest my eyes.' _she thought to herself. Tifa rested the side of her head on her up drawn knees, and before she knew it, she was asleep.

Vincent Gathered the torn sheets and the bloody comforter into his arms and went down the hall to the lab to bag the sheets and leave the blanket there for later washing. Tying the knot on the garbage bag and casting the blanket onto the table, he hurried down the hall back to Tifa. He looked at her form as it slumped in the chair. Her long hair had come out of the braid she had it is while she slept and it cascaded rather messily down around her. Her beautiful round face was soiled by a stain of his blood on her cheek. His black tee shirt and shorts were far to big for her and they slumped off her body. Vincent felt like locking himself in the coffin again. Vincent sighed, he was appalled by what he had done to this innocent girl. Vincent walked to her and slid his mechanical arm under her knees, taking care not to cut her with his sharp talon, and slipped his human arm behind her back. Lifting her with ease, he continued up the stairs. It was far more comfortable for him to carry her while she was sleeping than when she was awake and alert. He walked out of the passage and down the hall, into the room just past the piano room. He knelt down and rested Tifa on the couch. He gathered the blanket that she had used earlier off the floor and laid it over top of her. She smiled in approval in her sleep and coiled her hands in the blanket.

'_She looks so pretty, I think I could just eat her up, you know?' _Commented Chaos from within him.

Vincent, chose to ignore him as he admired her sleeping form. Vincent snapped his gaze from Tifa and walked down the hall to the piano room. Doing as he often did whenever he had destroyed his bed in his sleep, he opened the window and flung himself onto the roof above. Reaching down with his foot, he shut the window and then climbed onto the highest point of the roof. Vincent laid on his back and let the freezing Nibelhiem wing run over him and then, reluctantly, he slipped into sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

**AN: wow, it just occurred to me that Sephiroth doesn't have a last name. Wouldn't it piss you guys off If I just decided to give him a really wimpy last name? Sephiroth Schneider (no offence to people with a German heritage) or something like that? Hahaha I bet that's why he must have been so mentally unstable. What a horrible childhood, long silver hair, bright green eyes, a dad who geeks out over Jenova cells who enjoys dismembering people, and a name like Sephiroth Schneider. I guess technically his last name would be either Hojo or Valentine, whichever dorky fan tale you wish to believe.**

Tifa cracked open her eyes as she felt Vincent gently shaking her awake. "Vincent?" she asked.

"Yes Tifa, how's your back?" He replied, cutting right to the chase.

Tifa sat up, and surprisingly her back only ached a little. "Actually, really good." She replied, smiling sleepily at him.

"Excellent." he said, giving the materia in his hand a little shake. "Sorry to wake you up this early, but you have to pack and get ready to go."

"M'kay," she said cheerfully, excited over the fact that her back wasn't killing her. "Can you get this stuff of my back first though? I want to have a shower and besides, it's reeeeally itchy."

Vincent was confident that taking the dressing off wouldn't cause her any harm so he nodded. "Sure" he said moving to sit beside her.

Tifa lifted the back of her shirt up and was extremely glad that she had her back to him, or else he would have seen her blushing uncontrollably. She sat patiently, while Vincent cautiously removed the gauze smiling how well the materia had healed her back.

"There," he said when he was done. Tifa let Vincent's shirt fall back into place as she turned around. "Thanks Vincent." she said to him. "Vincent, I want you to know that I don't hold what happened against you. Okay?"

"But, I..." Tifa stopped him by putting a finger to his lips, this also made him uncomfortable.

"No, It wasn't your fault and that's final!" Tifa said, feigning anger.

Vincent smiled. "Thank you." he said standing up and leaving Tifa to change.

Tifa laughed a little as she gathered a towel, shampoo and conditioner from her bag as well as her skirt and tank top. Tifa wandered down the hall to the bathroom. After locking the door, she stripped out of Vincent's clothes and stepped into of the shower. She turned on the water and let the hot water run over her. She was extremely excited about seeing all her old friends.

Vincent finished stuffing his clothing into his backpack when he heard the water stop running. Knowing that there was still one more thing that he needed to get, he went upstairs to the safe across the hall from the passageway. Vincent absentmindedly inputted the combination and opened the safe to reveal his prized possession, the Death Penalty. He stroked the glossy black gun and turned it over to stare at the silver writing on the barrel that read _'Death Penalty.' _It was with mixed emotions that he took out the gun. It was like having being saved by your worst enemy. The gun was a horrible piece of metal that had taken many a life, but it had also saved his hide countless times.With a renewed drive, Vincent Holstered the gun and also took his less powerful _'Outsider' _and put it into the hidden holster on the inside of his cloak. Vincent kicked the safe shut and went downstairs to gather his bag.

Tifa, after getting dressed and brushing her hair, slid her feet into her shit kickers and stuffed all her belongings back into her bag. Tifa took a last look out the window before leaving the room, reveling in the familiarity of the mountains. SMACK! She felt like she had walked into a brick wall. The weight of her bag swinging backwards sent her tipping along with it. Vincent, after being momentarily shocked when Tifa actually smacked her head on his chest, reached out and grabbed her hand before she could fall on her behind.

"It's time to go." he said, pulling her up with one arm from the 45 degree angle that she had previously been at.

Tifa laughed "Thanks Vincent." she said as she brushed herself of and readjusted the backpack on her shoulders. She strolled with him to the front door. "Okay, is there anything else we need?" she asked, mentally going through a list of things that she had brought.

"I don't believe so." Vincent said, pulling open the heavy wooden door. He frowned as Tifa gave an involuntary shiver; there was actually frost on the ground. Yes, it would be another early winter in Nibelhiem.

'_Stupid leather jacket. Stupid Cloud for getting the stupid leather jacket,' _Tifa though to herself as she shivered again. Yep, it was minus 5-ish weather (That's around 28 degrees Fahrenheit.) and she was wearing a miniskirt, tank top and a leather jacket. Not smart planning on her part. She was thankful when Vincent turned to her, because he broke the wind very nicely.

Vincent flicked open the clasps on his cloak and shrugged it off his shoulders. He handed it to Tifa. "Wear this." he said, it was more of a statement than a request.

"I can't take that from you!" she exclaimed, noting the short sleeves of his shirt.

"Tifa, I...don't feel the cold the same as you. Do you remember when we were on our way up the mountain by icicle city? After you and cloud passed out, I dragged you for about an hour and a half before I passed out, and that was after I had draped my cloak over you two."

"Oh.." She said, not really sure how to respond. "Is that because of Hojo too?"

"Yes."

"I'm sorr..." Vincent stopped her. "I thought you promised me?" He said with a smile gracing his lips.

"Okay, then I guess I'm not sorry." She said, gingerly taking his cloak, as if it would bite her. She draped the heavy material around her shoulders, closing her eyes and letting a smile come to her face as she reveled in the warmth Vincent had left there.

"You'd better not be." he said with a small chuckle.

Tifa and Vincent walked together towards the mountain pass that had just been cleared. Tifa still wore Vincent's cloak, though it was not cold. It just made her feel secure, not that she would ever tell Vincent that. Vincent didn't mind though. He felt that Tifa was one of the very, very few people that he could be comfortable around without his cloak.

"Look out!" Tifa yelled as she rammed herself and Vincent down to the dirt. Tifa was glad that Vincent was there because he broke her fall. The red beam had just barely missed the two of them, it has actually just snagged a lock of hair from Tifa's head. Tifa looked up in fear at the huge armored lizard in front of them. It reared up on it's hind legs and screeched into the air. Tifa felt Vincent shift under her.

Vincent took this opportunity to his advantage. Grabbing the Death Penalty from its holster on his right leg, he reached around Tifa's back and shot the great beast in the windpipe. He had to admit that it was rather awkward the way Tifa sat on him. He gently rolled her off him and then sprang to his feet, reaching out his hand to help Tifa do the same. "Come Tifa, I think we've disturbed a nest." He said, running slowly so that Tifa could keep up with him. Tifa was a strong woman and she could hold out in a fight even against Vincent, but he would always be faster and have more stamina than her. This annoyed him to no end in AVALANCHE. He would always either scout ahead of be bored out of his mind keeping pace with the rest of them. He thought about carrying her, but decided against it. He had probably carried her enough and he didn't want to damage her pride even further. He just kept her hand tightly gripped in his, urging her along.

Tifa felt like a complete burden. She was already starting to get tired and Vincent showed no signs of slowing.

Vincent saw how disappointed Tifa was in herself and, in the midst of their running, decided now would be an appropriate time to thank her for saving him. "Thank you Tifa, I owe you a great deal for tackling me down."

"No problem." she said, short of breath.

"We're almost out Tifa," He said as he drew his Death Penalty and nailed another monster right between the eyes. '_Gods Vincent, why do you even tow her around with you?' _

'_I'm not in the mood Chaos.'_

'_Fine, I didn't want to talk to you anyways.' _mumbled Chaos from within him.

"Okay." replied Tifa.

After about 3 more minutes of running, Vincent slowed to a halt and turned to face Tifa. She was clearly exhausted. Her entire face was red with exertion and her breath came out in ragged gasps. She unconsciously fingered his cloak as she gasped for breath. Vincent felt badly for driving her so hard, knowing damn well that she didn't have the stamina to keep up with him. She hadn't said a word though, even though she knew she was pushing her limits. Vincent sighed heavily and pulled out a water bottle from his backpack. He handed it to Tifa as he looked around for a place to sit. He wandered over to a shady spot under a nearby tree. He patted the ground, gesturing for Tifa to sit beside him. She walked to him after taking a gasp of air when she pulled out of the deep drink of water. She sat down beside him and stretched her legs out in front of her while leaning her head back against the trunk of the tree.

"I'm sorry for pushing you so hard Tifa." apologized Vincent, looking at her out of the corner of his eye.

"That's okay, I'm fine now anyways." Tifa replied, inhaling the fresh, flowery air of the mountains. How long had it been since she had been out of Midgar, into the wilderness? She frowned as she thought of If or when she would go back.

"What's wrong?" Vincent dared to ask, noticing that Tifa had gone into deep thought.

"Nothing really, I was just wondering what will happen to up after this mission."

"What do you mean?" Vincent asked, turning his head to look at her.

"After the mission." she continued. "What will you and I do? Will we split up again?"

Vincent put some thought into this. "That...would probably suit your safety the best." he replied, immersing himself in a pit of self-hatred.

"What do you mean Vincent?"

'_Yeah Vincent, what do you mean?' _chuckled Chaos, imitating Tifa.

"I mean that you would not be safe if I were to stay with you. It's not that I would mean too, but I would most likely hurt you by accident." Vincent replied, further wallowing in his own hatred.

"You mean like last night? There's no way that it would happen again." Tifa replied.

"I don't mean like last night." Vincent became quiet. "I mean that I would transform...and I would probably kill you." He said with his brow furrowed and his eyes nailed to the ground.

"I know you wouldn't do that Vincent." Her voice softened and she put her hand on Vincent's shoulder. "Besides, I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself."

Vincent closed his eyes and cursed himself. "I know that Tifa, and if it was anyone else that you would have to protect yourself against, I wouldn't be so worried. But that's not the case, Tifa I am a monster." He felt ashamed to tell her this.

"Vincent...how could you say that? No matter what's inside you, you are not a monster."

"Oh, but I am Tifa. Even if I was strong enough to keep Chaos at bay, even if Chaos was no longer a part of me, my hands are still stained with blood. I am a Monster." Telling her this hurt him even more than a punch to the gut.

Tifa felt Vincent's pain; she felt his sorrow jabbing into her heart like a knife. A tear rolled down her face as she turned to Vincent. "Vincent, don't...don't say that." she said. Without warning, Tifa reached out her left hand and gripped Vincet's right shoulder and pulled herself to him.

Vincent felt a single hot tear roll down his face and into Tifa's hair as she lay there with her head against his chest. It brought painful memories crashing back, and the sudden contact wanted to make him try to wriggle out from under her. "I'm sorry Tifa, but if I were to ever hurt you, I couldn't live with myself." He put his mechanical hand against the back of her head and put his Human hand under the cloak, and rubbed her back in a circular motion as she sobbed uncontrollably into his shirt. As to why she was crying so hard was mystifying to him. Tifa confused him like a maze.

"...Don't...don't cry Tifa, please." He said, having not the slightest clue of what to say next.

Tifa felt ashamed of herself but at the same time she didn't care. She felt stupid for crying in front of Vincent. She felt so sad for him, no, she didn't pity him, she just felt so sad, the way he put himself down. The way he reveled in a pit of his own self hatred cut at her heart.

"I'm sorry, but I just don't want to hurt you." he mumbled softly.

"No!" she yelled suddenly. "Don't say that! You're just hiding!" she hit her fist against his chest softly. "You're just way to happy hating yourself, aren't you? You're too scared to be around people because you think they'll abandon you." she yelled almost instantly regretting what she had said to him. Had she gone too far? Would he distance himself from her now? That was the last thing that she wanted now that she had just started to break through his shell a little bit.

Her words had stung him. They hurt unlike any wound, because, unlike his cold hard exterior, his emotional state didn't heal as miraculously fast. He didn't show it, but he felt like squirming under her burning maroon eyes. When she put it that way it seemed petty and simple when it was in fact, complex and important. "Tifa, you don't understand..."

"Understand what Vincent?" She interrupted him in a stern voice. "What is there to understand? It's not like you've laid your life's story before me and I'm still being ignorant!"

"Tifa, you wouldn't even want to-"

"No, really. Apparently I don't understand, so, let's have it then." she said, gripping the front of his shirt when he tried to squirm away.

Vincent gritted his teeth. "You want to know? Fine I'll tell you!" He yelled, trying not to scare her but to make a point. "I was a Turk Tifa, I worked under Mr. ShinRa himself, doing his dirty work and killing his enemies. I killed them all without a moment's hesitation. Good or bad, right or wrong. It didn't matter to me as long as I got my pay, Tifa. Then I lost something very precious to me...and I felt like I couldn't go on. So when ShinRa ordered me to Nibelhiem to bodyguard some scientist, I took the opportunity because I had nothing to live for anymore!" He yelled, his anger growing. "The universe decided to have yet another laugh at my expense through and decided that Hojo, of all people, would be the scientist I bodyguard." His gaze softened. "...I thought things had started to look up for me when I met Lucrecia...she treated me with such kindness and I was in love with her." His eyes went hard again. "She was only using me though, she was with me only to make Hojo jealous. I had no idea that she and Hojo were even together, so when Lucrecia became pregnant, you could imagine my shock when she told me it was Hojo's. What was even worse though than having my heart ripped out was when I learned that they intended to use not only the baby, but Lucrecia as well in an experiment involving Jenova cells." Vincent looked at Tifa and then down to the ground. He placed his hand over a spot on his stomach. "I still cared for her though and she was still a good woman. Guess what happened when I confronted Hojo about it." He said to her. She just shook her head in puzzlement. Vincent drew his gun and shot off a bullet into the distance. "Bang," he said. "Right in my stomach. But oh no, that wasn't the end of that. No, the gods were having far to much fun with me to let it end there. Hojo used my corpse, well no, I shouldn't say that. He used my _live_ body in a series of experiments. Countless surguries to disconect and reconnect nerves, countless scars to remind me of the bones that were broken and reset, all while I was awake of course. Then there was also this.." Vincent said, lifting his claw into the sunlight. "I hoped I would die of blood loss when he took my arm Tifa, I really did, but no. I lived through him cutting off my arm and I had to watch myself become less and less human everyday. I had to sit and watch him inject me with the DNA of other life forms just for his twisted experiments...But...it's all my punishment for letting her die...for all the blood I've spilt."

She looked up at him with teary eyes. "Vincent, no matter who you were and what you did, you couldn't have deserved that!"

"I did Tifa! I deserve it! I'm a monster!" he exploded at her.

"NO! You're not!" she yelled back.

Suddenly he reeled over to the ground. Tifa was at his side instantly. "Vincent!" she screamed. His pupils narrowed into slits as he broke into a fit of seizure like trembling. Unlike a seizure though, he remained completely aware and she could see the wild, primal fear growing in his eyes.

"Run!" he managed to yell through his gritted teeth.

"You know I won't!" she yelled right back at him. She moved behind him and held his head firmly in her lap to prevent him from hitting it on the ground. Vincent closed his eyes. He was fighting some kind of internal battle and he was obviously loosing. Vincent grew still and went into a rigor mortis-like state. "Vincent?" she asked.

Vincent's eyes snapped open. She gasped in fear. Whatever it was, that was not Vincent. His eyes weren't the regular deep crimson that she was used too. They were a harsh vermillion, bright red flecked with black. A wry grin broke across his face and his hands shot up to grab the back of her neck. He yanked her down, a shot of pain coursing through her back as it bent too far down. She had to flip to her knees to prevent her spine from snapping in two. He brought her down until their eyes were only half an inch apart from each other.

"Say it." He said in a voice that wasn't Vincent's it was harsh and a higher pitch than Vincent's stoic baritone.

"W-what?" she breathed.

"I am a Monster. Say it."

"No..."

'Vincent' grew angry "Say it!" he bellowed.

"NO!" she shrieked.

He tossed her to the side and rolled over to straddle her. He grabbed her shoulders and brought her forward. He used one hand to put under her chin and bring her face to his.

"Say it, just say it 'Vincent, you are a monster.' It's that easy."

"Never! You're NOT Vincent!" She cried.

He chuckled. "When you get right down to it, when you strip away the mask that Vincent wears, I_ am_ Vincent." He sneered evilly.

"_You _are a monster. Vincent is NOT!"

'Vincent' became enraged and threw Tifa violently against a tree. He got up and barreled towards her with his claw bared. 'Vincent' was only a few feet away when Tifa's ear piercing scream rang out. Her hands flew up to her face and she clamped her eyes shut. Vincent stopped dead in his tracks, the real Vincent. He refrained from falling to his knees with the fatigue of fighting off Chaos and ran to Tifa's side.

"Tifa! Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" he asked frantically.

"No you didn't," she lied, ignoring the gnawing pain in the bottom of her back.

"Oh god Tifa, I'm so sorry. I knew it was a bad idea for me to be around you, I can't hide from myself." He said, avoiding Tifa's eyes as he helped her to her feet.

Tifa knitted her brow. She raised her hand and slapped him square on his left cheek, just hard enough to leave a red mark. "Vincent Valentine! Stop saying that right now!"

He reached up and touched the spot on his face where Tifa's blow had landed. "Tifa...I'm sorry I-"

Slap! She whacked him again, but this time in a soft playful manor. "And that too." she giggled. "Vincent, you say something to put yourself down one more time and I will personally beat you senseless! Do you understand me Mister Valentine?" she asked, placing her hands on her hips.

"So...It's to be fisticuffs, is it Miss Lockheart?" He asked with a smirk.

"I guess so...Mister Valentine" she replied, mimicking his stoic tone while raising her fists. She knew he was serious and she wouldn't let him call her bluff.

Vincent gave a chuckle and then reached down to flick the straps on his gun's holster open, setting his gun down on the ground after flicking on the safety. "Well then Miss Lockheart, I'm waiting." he said putting his hands in his pockets.

The corners of Tifa's mouth twitched into a smile when he put his hands in his pockets. She knew that making the first move was never a smart idea, but she knew that Vincent wouldn't hurt her, so she took a rush at him. As she approached him, he stepped back to avoid the thrust of her palm that was intended for his chest. She had been anticipating that, so she used her momentum to slide to him with a sweep kick intended to knock him down for a follow up attack.

Vincent smirked and jumped above her sweep. He was now barreling down towards her so that he could land on top of her.

Tifa rolled to the side just as Vincent landed. She did a backwards summersault to avoid his leap towards her and also to get to her feet. He dashed towards her with incredible speed. Tifa held her ground though and raised her leg for a lashing kick to his chest as he ran towards her.

Vincent knew that he wouldn't have been able to stop himself in time to come short of Tifa's kick, so instead he took a small step to the right so that he was now on the inside of Tifa's strike. He grabbed her leg when it swung out just past his chest. Vincent yanked her towards him and raised his forearm to pin it under her chin.

Tifa was too tricky for him though; she used his strong hold on her knee as leverage and made a hop with her free leg. Within a heartbeat she brought her leg up for a roundhouse kick to his shoulder. It was a recoil move, for she knew that when and if her blow connected, Vincent would drop her and send her falling on her behind. Her hope was that she could recover faster that Vincent could.

Vincent was not expecting Tifa to retaliate so well, especially after so long after their last real fight with Sephiroth. Nonetheless he raised his arm sorely regretting that he had exposed his human hand to her counterattack. He moved his arm in such a way that the blow lost most of it's momentum before the blow actually hit. Still, the blow sent him reeling sideways, so much so that he lost his grip on Tifa. Both he and Tifa were sent toppling to the ground.

Vincent retaliated first, he was on her in an instant. He dashed to her with incredible speed and dodged a kick that she had sent at him from the ground. Her foot whizzed by his face with only about an inch of space in between.

Tifa sprang to her feet and rushed Vincent with a punch to the stomach, which he dodged. Then she tried an elbow to the chest. He blocked that as well, this man was starting to get on her nerves. She fired a right jab at his face, only to have him duck underneath it.

Vincent squatted down to avoid the blow intended for his face. He sprang forward at a forty five degree angle, conecting with Tifa's stomach against his shoulder. He grabbed the back of her knees and tipped her over backwards so that he held her dangling over his shoulder.

Tifa hardly knew what had happened. First she saw Vincent duck underneath her fist and then all of the sudden, she was dangling upside down over Vincent's feet, his hands secure vices holding her legs, preventing escape. Her long hair fell over her head, the ends gently dusting the ground. She tried to escape his grip, but at the angle she was at she only clawed at the back of his calves and knees trying to gain some leverage. How ridiculous she must look, still wearing Vincent's cloak, her hair hanging upside down and her arms crossed, slung over the back of a six foot tall morose looking man and having the pout of a ten year old child on her face. "Let me go Vincent!" she whined crossly.

Vincent, feeling that he hadn't humiliated her enough, said: "As you wish" and let go of her legs for a split second, letting her drop a couple of inches. Tifa gasped and clung to the back of his leg for dear life.

"That is not funny!" she exclaimed and punched him in the back of the leg.

"That's not true Tifa," he swung her out gently by the legs so that he was holding her in front of him and looking down into her upside down face. "Actually, I find this quite amusing."

Tifa was utterly shocked at his strength; he was leisurely holding her by the ankles without even straining the muscles in his arms and shoulders. "Well, I'm glad you get a kick out of my misfortune Vincent."

"I'm glad too." he said with a smirk. "But...it would seem that you have lost miss Lockheart, do I win anything?" he asked her jokingly.

"Yes you did" she said in the sweetest tone. "You have won the right to live another day, now put me down." her voice cracked into a dire seriousness.

"Now, now Tifa, that's no way to address the person who has beaten you fair and square. Now, try again, put me down...what?"

"Now, put me down…now?" she replied jokingly, losing her serious tone.

"No," Vincent was in a strangely good mood in light of all that had happened. "Try, put me down..." he thought for a minute. "Vincent the almighty."

"No way," Tifa told him.

"Oh, what's this?" he said, feigning shock. "My grip seems to be slipping, whatever shall poor Tifa do?" he said in his monotone.

The way Vincent always sounded so serious, even when he joked was odd, but still he _did _have a pretty good sense of humor when he tried. She laughed up until the point when he actually started to loosen his grip on her. "Okay! Okay!" She yelled frantically. "Put me down..." she gritted her teeth. "...Vincent the...almighty." She let out a yelp as Vincent suddenly let her go. His arms immediately flew underneath her to keep her from hitting the earth.

"That wasn't so hard, now was it?" he asked, helping her to her feet.

"This isn't over," she threatened.

"Oh isn't it?" he asked. "Because I think you and I both know what will happen next time you try to 'beat me senseless' again." He remarked as he began to walk down the path too Rocket town.

She sighed, it was unlikely that she could beat him in her untrained state. "Vincent...really though, would you make me another promise?" she asked nervously.

Vincent became serious again upon seeing how serious Tifa was. "Again," he said. "That will depend on the nature of the promise."

"Hmmm, I was afraid that you would say that. I want you to promise me that you won't just run off on me like you did AVALANCHE." _Like Cloud did, you mean?_ said the inner Tifa that wished for more than everything for Cloud to come back to her.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked with a look of puzzlement on his face.

"I mean, don't just run off because you think that I'm at risk around you okay? Last time you did that, you started spurting some nonsense about how you needed to atone for your sins and then holed yourself up in ShinRa manor again." she said, wincing at the bluntness in her own words.

Vincent frowned. He had indeed run off and 'holed' himself away, but there was a good reason. He _did _have to atone for his sins and the way she had said it made it sound small and petty. He had told her some of the things he had done and still, she did not see him as a man who had sinned. Why? In his eyes, he was a monster who had no right to be forgiven, and yet, here she was, saying that he had done nothing. "It's not as simple as that Tifa, I have committed atrocities in the past that are unforgivable. I do need to try though, to redeem myself. Don't you see that what I have done is deserving of punishment?" he asked, more of a statement.

She half lost her temper again. "Vincent! Okay, I'll admit that you've done some shitty things in the past." she said with a raised voice. Tifa rarely swore so this gave Vincent an Idea of how serous she was. "But" she continued. "You say that your biggest one was letting Lucrecia die right? Well you didn't let her die! Did you personally kill her?" she asked.

"No..but-"

"Did _you_ inject her with Jenova cells?"

"No."

"What was there that you could have done to save her!?"

"I could have stopped her."

"You did! And you got shot for it." she said, unconsciously placing her hand on her abdomen.

…There was a long silence that followed.

"Tifa I just-" He was interrupted by the roar of an engine over the mountain just a shot distance away from the path they were walking on. Over the peak of the mount came the Highwind all at once. Cid at the viewing deck, looking over the railing at them.

"You two sure were takin' your sweet f time, geez. I figured I'd come pick ya up!" he yelled over the engines. The Highwind kicked up a huge amount of dust and wind as it descended. "Climb aboard!" cid yelled, throwing a rope ladder over the side. He had yet to fix the main door after they crashed into the north crater. Cid waited for them to climb the ladder.

Vincent turned to Tifa and said to her quietly. "Tifa, I just can't be…forgiven for what I've done."

Tifa unbuckled Vincent's cloak and used the gesture of her handing it to him as a disguise to whisper in his ear "You're the only one who needs to forgive yourself."

Vincent stood there, dumbfounded as he watched Tifa climb the rope ladder. He was only snapped out of his daze when Cid yelled at him. "What are you waiting for Dracula, a formal invitation?! I don't have all day, so hurry up Sunshine!" Vincent just jumped up onto the viewing deck in one leap, shocking Cid as he landed right in front of him. Vincent didn't hear Cid's stupid joke as he walked away, he really just wanted to be alone right now.

**AN/ Yikes, it's been s long since I last updated. I had to cut this chapter short because it was taking to long and I had to give you guys**_** something**_**. I know I made Tifa sound like a wimp, but that's just because Cloud and Vincent are starting to overlap for her and she thinks Vinnie is going through the same stuff as Cloud. Maybe this is her way of forgiving herself for not helping Cloud, by helping someone who is in the same situation? I dunno, I have not decided yet. I know I said that the plot would start to unfold this chapter, but I led. Next chapter though, really. I'm just laying the ground work now, or, at least that's what I tell myself. Oh, by the way, I thank ****Cristal**** for her wonderful review. You're awesome, and I'm glad that my fanfic has got you started on VincentXTifa. Really, I'm actually kid of honored. To all my other (six --) reviewers, thanks sooooooo much, it really made my day to read your positive feedback. **

**But pleeeaaasssee! ****REVIEW!!**** MY GOAL IS TO GET AT LEAT ONE REVIEW FOR EVERY CHAPTER OR SO HELP ME GOD, I WILL….well I don't know what I'll do…But I'ma cookin' up somethin'.**


	10. Chapter 10: Humanity

**A/N: Hey guys. So I realize it's been a while since I've written; years in fact. It feels good to be writing again, I realized that when I found my old writing of this story, Midnight's Illusion. The first thought that came to mind was that the title is beyond horrible, but if I remember correctly, the only reason I gave it that godawful name was because I had no idea how the plot of the story was going to unfold, so i just gave it a sort if non-committal name. But yeah, I plan to continue with this and I hope you'll all continue reading and forgive me for leaving you all. T-T Also, beware of Lemon in this Chapter, of which there is much. Sorry in advance**

Tifa stepped onto the Highwind, recalling the final battle, and how this ship had saved their lives. Just when she thought that she wold die, the Highwind had come crashing into the crater like a bat out of hell, or their guardian angel sent from the heavens as it had been. She looked over her shoulder to see Vincent stepping gracefully onto the deck of the ship, his cloak in hand, not looking at her, but she could see that his mind was on her, and what she had said.

Cid jolted her from her thoughts as he abruptly spoke as he walked towards the cabin. "So, we've still got to pick Yuffie up yet, so you're both free to roam anywhere on the ship your little hearts desire, and your old cabins are all ready for you, I suggest you go to bed early, cause we'll be in Wutai tomorrow at dawn" He laughed to himself as he opened the door for Tifa and Vincent. "So how you guys been, haven't seen y'all in ages."

"Oh, fine," said Tifa dismissively.

Vincent shrugged, and merely turned and wandered into the depths of the ship.

"Same old Vinnie," he said with a touch of distaste, as if he was hoping for someone different.

"If it's alright with you Cid, I'd like to wander the ship for a while," Tifa said.

"No one wants to talk to me, I guess," Cid replied with feigned sadness. "No problem, there's nothin' important going on right now."

Tifa smiled, "Thanks Cid," she said wandering off in the general direction of the viewing deck.

Her footsteps seemed to loud to her as each footfall brought a resonating sound from within the hollow walked to the front of the ship where an expanse of glass circled the helm of the ship, and she could see the expansive landscape whizzing by far below. Tifa walked to the railing and remembered the last time she had stood here, watching the Lifestream race across the land towards The Meteor that was threatening to destroy the planet. They all watched in dazed amazement as the green light, a seemingly insubstantial wispy green stuff, began to eat away at the meteor, breaking it down into dust, vapor, nothingness, right before their eyes. This is the life of the planet, she remembered thinking, and in the midst of this spectacular sight, she looked to her friends. She looked to Cloud, who for the first time in months, had a look of hope on his face. She looked at him, and her eyes welled because she thought that this would be the end of Cloud's struggle and suffering. She looked to Barret, Red XIII, to Yuffie, Cid, and Cait Sith, who all had looks of similar relief and amazement. Everyone except Vincent Valentine, who stood, looking on, stoic as a statue. Tifa wondered now what he had been thinking right at that moment. He had looked so deeply in thought that anyone would wonder what he could be thinking at a time like that.

Just as she had been thinking of Vincent, the man himself walked in.

"Well as usual, this place is a dump," he said offhandedly as some way to strike up a conversation. Vincent strode to where Tifa was leaned against the rail, where she was seemingly in deep thought. There was a long silence where both of them just looked at the plains that raced by past the ship.

"Vincent?" she asked, taking his prior subject choice as a sign that he did not want to talk about what she had said to him outside the airship.

"Yes?"

"Do you remember when we watched the Lifestream destroy Meteor, right here?"

"Yes of course."

"I remember as everyone else was looking outside, at what was happening, you weren't, you had your usual 'vincent-thinking-deep-thoughts' face on," Tifa said, making a frowning face, her brow in deep furrows. "I was just wondering what you were thinking about, if you remember?"

Vincent did in fact remember, he remembered very well what he was thinking at that moment. He was thinking about the fact that he-they, all of them, had put an end to what he had let happen thirty years prior. They had killed Sephiroth, Lucrecia's child. He was thinking that it had finally been made right, as right as it could be, and now that it had, what was to become of him? He thought about killing himself, but Chaos would not let Vincent end his life, he had tried before. He thought about putting himself back in his coffin, but in truth, he was to afraid to lose what little he had in this world. This way, at least one day, he would most likely die in battle, and wouldn't have to sleep in his coffin with the knowledge that the next time he saw the light of day, his friends, anyone he had ever known would be dead, and yet he would continue on, like some sort of wraith. "No, I don't remember, " he replied. She could never know what he had thought that day.

"Oh, that's too bad, I had just been wondering," She said with a sigh. "Vincent?"

"Yes?"

"It it wrong of me to hate Cloud?"

Vincent blinked in surprise, he had not been expecting that. "I...do not think it is necessarily right for you to hate him, but it is...understandable."

Tifa looked at Vincent. "You think so?"

Vincent sighed, he did not know how to handle situations like this. They were so delicate, and he had lost his grip on humanity a long time ago. He would try, for her. "He hurt you, by leaving, and it must feel like him ever wanting to be with you was a lie. I think that it may be understandable for you to feel angry. I don't even think you hate him, although you may think you do." He hoped he had said the right thing.

Tifa frowned. "How would you know how I feel?"

"I don't for sure, I think you are to tender a person to truly hate anyone who you have ever loved."

Tifa sighed "I want to hate him," she said.

"I know," Vincent replied.

Tifa put her face in her hands for a moment and took a deep breath. She stood up straight and ran a hand through her hair. "Vincent, I just, I feel so alone in the world. I feel like I'm drowning, because I have no one. I had no one but him, and there is no one in the entire world who would notice if I just..." she trailed off as if searching for the words. "up and left," she continued, "if I just decided to leave one day." Tears rolled down her face as she spoke. "If I just died. And God, the only thing that I have wanted since my parents died, is to have someone who would. I've tried being that person for everyone else, but It's just not enough, because no one is ever concerned about me. It doesn't even occur to anyone that anything could possibly be wrong with me." She wiped at her eyes willing herself to stop. "I must sound so stupid and selfish right now," she said, turning her back to Vincent so he wouldn't see. "I'm sorry Vincent, you don't deserve this from me."

Vincent was taken slightly aback by this. He had never know Tifa as someone who confessed their deepest troubles to someone, and he realized that she was partially correct, because he had never assumed Tifa to have any issues like this. She was always the strong, impervious backbone to the felt as if he should have known that she too could feel just like everyone else. He gingerly reached out and touched her shoulder with his human hand as if she were the most fragile porcelain doll in the world. "Look at me," he said gently. She turned around, ashamedly hiding her eyes from him. Vincent took a deep breath and steadied himself. He gently pulled her towards him and she came closer, still not looking at him. Vincent closed the distance and pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her, and to his amazement, she put her arms around him, her hands smoothing up his back to his shoulders and resting there. She pulled him so close, so desperately, and for a moment Vincent reveled in it. She was so soft, and yielding and warm. "I would care if you just left, and I would certainly care if you died, and I know I'm not Cloud and I can never be what you wanted from him, but if you'll let me, I won't let you drown."

If Tifa hadn't been crying already, she'd have cried at Vincent's buried her face into his chest and pulled him closer. He was so warm and the feeling of his strong arms around her made her feel so secure. The human contact felt so good, so right, she wanted more of it. She didn't want to let go. "Vincent, can we just...can we just stay like this?"

"As long as you'd like," he replied, "though perhaps not here."

He was right of course, she didn't particularly want to be walked in on by anyone, and he probably wasn't too fond on the idea either. So they went to the nearest place, the old cabin Tifa had shared with Aeris back when.

Vincent became slightly uncomfortable, being in such an intimate place. His want for more contact made him stay however and he and Tifa sat on her old bed, Vincent sitting against the headboard and Tifa sitting between his legs with her back against his chest. They stayed like that for a long time.

"Vincent, what does this mean for you and I?" Tifa asked.

Vincent thought for a long while. What did he want? More of this, more of whatever this was. "If you want, things can remain unchanged and we can be just as we were before."

"I don't want that," she replied, " do you?"

Vincent hesitated, he should say yes. "No," he replied, in spite of himself.

Tifa sat up, extricating herself from his arms, and turned around to look at him, and then she did the most curious thing.

She kissed him.

Vincent jolted back in surprise.

Tifa pulled away, hurt. What had she done, Vincent obviously hadn't really thought of her that way. "I'm so sorry Vincent, I shouldn't have-"

Vincent put a hand behind her neck and pulled her closer and kissed her back. and then he kissed her again. And again, and again. His tongue dipped into her mouth, tasting her, and she returned the favor. They tasted each other, collapsing onto each other in passion. Suddenly Tifa's hands were under his shirt, hands caressing the hard muscled of his abdomen, tracing up to his chest. Tifa felt conflicted, as if in doing this, she would be cheating on Cloud in some way. She realized with a jolt, that he had left her, she wasn't obligated to him anymore. She grabbed his shirt by the hem and pulled it gently from where it was tucked into the waistline of his pants. Tifa's treacherous hands seemed to move of their own accord under his shirt and glided up the planes of his chest, caressing the lean muscles she found there. Suddenly, Vincent went rigid.

"Vincent, what-" then she saw his chest. She saw the huge grisly looking scars that formed a line from chest to pelvis and and two lines, on at the top, running collarbone to collarbone, and the other running between his hipbones, like the remnants of some sick dissection, and she understood why he had froze. He hadn't wanted her to see them. "Vincent, I don't care, they don't change who you are."

"But they mark me for what I am," he said.

"You aren't _anything._ You're just Vincent."

"Tifa..." he said softly.

"And besides," she continued, "I have a few of my own," she said as she pulled off her own shirt. Scars she did have, she had many, but they did nothing to distract from her beauty. Tifa had a scar that ran from right collarbone to left hip, a remnant of what Sephiroth had done to her, a pearly white line that was puckered and pink still in places, after all this time. It looked strangely interesting, beautiful almost, Vincent thought with an almost morbid fascination with the scar that so reminded him of his own, with or without which, she was the most lovely creature he had ever seen.

Vincent's breath caught, " Gods, you are beautiful." He ran his hands up her hips and along her waist to the bottom of her bra to where he stroked the soft fabric of the bra, and felt the warmth of the flesh beneath through the non-existent fabric. He pulled her close and kissed her again, deeply, shuddering in pure pleasure as he tasted her, Tifa. He raised his head from hers and gently kissed his way down her neck, down her collarbone, to the swells of her breasts, at the same time undoing her bra with one motion. Tifa flushed such a deep shade of red as he pulled away her bra. Vincent kissed her, sweetly this time. "You don't need to be embarrassed in front of me" He gently pushed her back up so he could get a better view. Her breasts were so round and gorgeous. He took one perfect breast in his human and and gave a gentle squeeze, circling the are around her nipple with his thumb, and it was Tifa's turn to catch her breath. He took the other one into his mouth, and gently sucked her nipple tonguing the tender flesh, drawing a soft moan from her. He flicked his tongue back and forth over her nipple until it peaked under his attention. He sucked and tongued the other until it matched the first. He was so hard, and he could feel her warmth through his pants and her almost nonexistent underwear where she straddled him, and it was enough for him to buck against her in an effort to gain the stimulation he ached for.

She gasped as she felt his hardness against her. She whimpered slightly with how desperate to have him inside of her. This brought a guttural sound from Vincent, somewhat like a growl, and he grabbed her ass and made her go to her hands and knees on top of him. He was so hungry for touch, for passion, love, the comfort of another body-hungry for her.

"Kiss me," he said, and she did without hesitation. Tifa was so desperate for touch, so desperate to feel anything after months of loneliness.

"Touch me, please, anything..." she moaned.

Vincent was hardly a man to disobey his lady and happily obliged. He ran his hands all about her, innocently at first, caressing her sides, thumbs brushing the soft flesh of her breasts as they grazed by, and degrading in morality from there. He reached his human hand between her legs and into her panties before slipping a finger deep inside her.

Tifa screamed at the instant pleasure of having Vincent inside her, even like this. Her hips bucked against him, pleaing for more in silent desperation. She cried out in deep pleasure as he worked her with one finger at first and then slowly easing in the second. She was so wet, so ready that fluid ran down Vincent's hand.

"Please Vincent..." She whispered. He knew what she was begging for. Gods he wanted this so bad, but couldn't help but wonder, even at a moment like this, if this was all a mistake, if tomorrow, they would wake up and she would regret what she had done with him. As much as he would have enjoyed watching her in so much pleasure, he was so hard and every movement was tortuous on sensitive flesh. He wanted her just as badly as she wanted him. He slid her panties and skirt off of her while she fumbled desperately with his belt, finally managing to get it undone. He lifted his hips as she slid his pants off.

God, Tifa thought, he's so big, almost to big. Her thought was interrupted by Vincent rolling her onto the bottom, and suddenly he was between her legs, propped on his elbows, kissing her.

"Vincent, please, I want you so badly."

Vincent tongued her earlobe, making her gasp, "I'll be gentle," He said.

"Don't be. A little pain just lets you know you're alive," she replied.

Vincent did not need any more encouragement. He thrust himself inside her, hard, and Tifa muffled a scream in Vincent's shoulder as he eyes widened in a mix o pleasure, pain, and shock.

"Vincent..." she moaned over and over as he thrust inside pulled out, and slammed back into her.

She was so tight around him, it felt so good. " Is this good?" He panted, " Am I hurting you?"

"A little, but not enough," she replied between moans, "Harder, please," she screamed, her own hips moving to meet his thrusts. Vincent's breath escaped i in a gasp, all of this, it was too much. He quickened his pace slamming into her with every stroke, and in her pleasure, she felt a need to inflict pain upon him, an animal instinct that she had never before experienced, not during sex, and she drug her nails down his back. Vincent shivered with pleasure.

"Again, please, harder," he moaned, and she raked her nails down his back. He cried out. "Break the skin," he told her, and this time with a little hesitation, she did, she tore his back open with her nails and he growled deep in his chest in a way that she could only take as pleasure as he picked her up and pinned her against the headboard, so that her ass was no longer touching the mattress, and fucked her, fir lack of a better word, harder than she ever had been before. She reveled in the pain, raking her nails down his back again, tearing flesh. She had never had sex like this before, and neither had he, it was as if they were punishing each other with their bodies, and both of them luxuriated in it. Tifa could feel an orgasm building, and building, so close. She screamed his name as she climaxed, sending incredible waves of pleasure through her, and she arched against Vincent, riding out the most intense orgasm of her life Her body was on fire, nerves screamed all over, and shivers of pleasure wracked her entire being.

Feeling Tifa Tighten around him so much during her peak was all he could take, and he shuddered all over as he came inside her. He threw his head back as they climaxed together.

Muscles shaking with the overexertion, he picked Tifa up and placed her gently on her back on the bed.

Tifa's chocolate brown eyes met Vincent's wine red ones. She felt such an attraction to him, who he was. She felt an attraction to the basic sameness between them. They were alike in so many ways and yet complete opposite in others, but there was still that similarity that drew her to him. She felt this attraction to him, but there was also something more that she was beginning to feel for him; something that scared her, something that she didn't have the courage to give a name to just yet. But still, lying there in his embrace, Tifa felt safe, secure, and she held him back like he was the only steady hing in a world adrift in chaos. Ironic that Vincent was her shelter from life's chaos. "Vincent, that was amazing. I didn't even know it could be like that. Sweet Planet that was the most amazing sex I've ever had."

Vincent nodded as tightened his arms around her. He wondered silently what would happen after this. He knew that this would change things, but how much or in what way, he did not know. Things had moved to fast, and this was an accident on both of their parts, he knew. They had both been so starved for human touch, affection, and in their sorrows had taken comfort in eachother's bodies. That didn't mean that what they had done together was wrong, far from it. They were two consenting adults who, perhaps short of loved, but cared deeply for each other. "I know, me too." He smiled, not having felt this content in years.

"You were amazing, I-" she stopped for a moment. "Oh my god Vincent, we didn't use anything." she said, panicked. "Oh gods, how could I be so stupid. I've been on birth control so long, I just-i just."

"Tifa, stop," he said. "There is nothing to fear, it's okay."

"What do you mean?" she nearly yelled, "What If I get pregnant Vincent? I can't get pregnant."

Vincent stroked her hair, "There's no need to worry, Tifa, I am completely infertile."

She stopped, "Wait, what?" he hadn't just said what she thought he said, did he?

Vincent nodded, "Hojo made it that way."

"Oh Vincent, I'm so sorry," Tifa said.

"Don't be, It's really a blessing, because any children of mine would likely be stillborn or be born an actual monster," he said in a cool monotone.

Tifa wrapped her arms around him and held him. She was sorry, sorry for everything that had happened to Vincent in his lifetime. His whole life was full of misfortune and suffering. "One day," she said, "I'm going to show you that there is more to life than pain and suffering, really show you. I don't know how yet, but mark my words Vincent Valentine." Maybe part of the reason she was drawn to Vincent, probably to cloud as well, was because she had this uncontrollable desire to help them. She so badly wanted to help Vincent wade through all the guilt he was drowning in.

"Oh, I'll mark them well," he laughed halfheartedly. Tifa leaned in close and kissed him on the forehead. He moved them both under the blankets and got closer to Tifa, resting his head on her chest.

Tifa smiled contentedly, a satisfying ache between her legs as she stroked his silky black hair. She felt amazing. The sex had been so passionate. Sex with Cloud had never been like this, It had been good, but never passionate as it had been tonight with Vincent. She thought about how she wished she could stay like this forever, with him, and nodded off.

**A/N: Hey so for any of you who are readers of the first nine Chapters of Midnight's Illusion (god the name must be changed) I look forward to feedback, on both the story and my writing in and of itself. I'm hoping that in three years I have improved slightly and that I haven't changed the overall feel of the story too much, and don't fear, I'm starting on the next chapter right now.. Review pleeeaaassseeee. Thanks Guys.**


	11. Chapter 11: Onward

_**AN: Hey guys, so I wonder if you noticed that I changed the nae of this fanfic to, if nothing else, more poetic and interesting "I Wish I was the Moon," as opposed to the old title of "Midnight's Illusion," which sounds like it should be the sooper seecwul to "My Immortal," which still makes me shudder. Funny thing, I came so very close to naming a character that is later to come In this Vampire, as a nickname that related to his line of work, and because I have a passion for naming my characters after nouns and certain adjectives and other such oddities, like Kestrel, or Wicked or Whisper, or Grey, which by the way are likely to come up in the future because they're kind of my fallback names. :P Anyways, enough about me, lets talk about you. If you leave me a review, I'll...give you a cookie! How's that sound? Yeah, I thought so.**_

Tifa woke to Vincent's strong arms wrapped around her. She had a hard time fathoming what had happened between her and Vincent. The things he said, what he did, everything was just so...un-Vincent of him. She knew he had a great capacity for kindness , and even love. She wondered if he wanted to be with her, or if last night was just out of need for human contact, for touch, something that she knew he hadn't gotten nearly enough of in the last 30 years. And what about her? What had she been doing? She had initiated the whole thing. She had been so hungry for someone to touch her again, to be wanted, that she forgot about everything else. Everything had gone so fast, she wondered if having sex with Vincent was a mistake. Not that she didn't want it, but was jumping into a relationship sex-first ever the best choice? She tried to put it out of her mind. She knew Vincent would not leave her, but...what would this change?

Vincent's eyes flickered open and he looked down at Tifa. He smiled at her, and seeing Vincent smile made her start smiling like an idiot too. She laughed and buried her face in his chest to hide her idiotic smile. How could she regret this, she thought, how could she not want this? Vincent's hand traveled down to her waist, and-"Ow," Tifa exclaimed.

Vincent looked down to see that his prosthetic claw had cut her. "Oh Tifa, I'm so sorry, I wasn't thinking," he said ashamedly. He should never forget that he would never be just like anyone else. If for no other purpose, that was why Hojo put that arm there, as a reminder.

Tifa hissed in pain. The cut didn't bleed to badly, but it was fairly deep and stung like hell. "It's okay, it's not to bad. It was an accident anyways." She sat up and threw her knees over the side of the bed. "We should get dressed though, before anyone comes to wake us."

He nodded silently. "I think That I will return to my own cabin to shower," he said, pulling his pants on.

Tifa hesitated a moment. "Alright," she replied, she would also enjoy a nice hot shower at the moment. She watched Vincent's muscles move as he put his shirt over his head. He was so handsome, beautiful even, which seemed odd in Tifa's head, because beautiful is a term that is almost strictly applied to feminine good looks, and yet Vincent managed it while remaining attractive in a wholly masculine way.

Vincent turned as he felt Tifa's eyes on him. She averted her gaze so swiftly, It wade Vincent smirk in amusement. "You know, now you're allowed to ogle me unashamedly."

"I should hope so," she muttered, still not looking at him.

"And besides," he continued, "you were never quite as secret about it as you thought you were."

Tifa flushed a deep shade of red. She turned on her heel and walked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. "I'll see you later Vincent."

She heard him laugh to himself softly."Indeed, Miss Lockhart."

"Hey!" she exclaimed, "I thought you were going to stop calling me that."

"Well, before, it was to show respect, but now it's an ever so endearing pet name for you," he said, as she heard him leave the room.

"Bastard," she said to herself with a smile.

~..::)O(::..~

"Tifa!" Barret exclaimed as he threw his arms around her, lifting her off the ground.

"Glad to see you to Barret, but you're crushing me a little," was Tifa's slightly wheezy reply.

"How ya' been, Tifa?"

She smiled warmly at Barret. "Not bad," she lied. "How's Marlene?"

"Aw, she's real good. She's growin' up so fast, I hardly know what to do. She asks about you a lot. She misses ya' real bad. She needs a lady around sometimes, and I'm not a good replacement."

"I miss her to, Barret. I've been thinking about you both a lot lately. I wanted to come see you two so badly, but I just..."

Barret ruffled her hair. "Oh, you know you're welcome anytime."

"I just thought that I hadn't talked to you in so long. I just thought that maybe you wouldn't want me around," she said guiltily.

"Don't say that Tifa, you're like my family. I'd never turn ya' away," he said, sitting down in the folding chair he'd brought out onto the deck.

Tifa took the hint to sit down too, and clutched her coffee closer, pulling the sweater she had stolen from Vincent while he was in the shower more tightly around herself. The airship had slowed to easy cruising speed as they approached Wutai, the soft morning light slowly creeping across the land.

"So what happened between you and Cloud?" Barret asked. "I guess cause he ain't here, that means something happened between you two."

Tifa contemplated her reflection in the black coffee. "He just up and left Barret. Gone. Poof."

Barret looked utterly surprised. "What'dya mean? Why?"

She shrugged, "To go look for Aeris, I suppose. Or to come to terms with her being gone at least."

They sat in silence for a long time.

"How long ago?" He asked.

"About a month ago, I guess. I tried to just keep on going like normal, you know run the bar, and all that, but I just couldn't do it. I couldn't just stay there with no one, you know?" She asked.

"Yeah, I get that," he said sympathetically. "If it weren't for Marlene, I'd have lost it a while ago. Even sometimes, I keep it together because I know I have to, for her."

She nodded. She wished she had someone like that, to keep her sane. She paused mid thought. She had Vincent now, didn't she? She smiled to herself. She did have someone now. "Where is Marlene anyways? Who's looking after her?"

Barret let out a hearty laugh. "You know, the funniest thing. You know who took a real shine to Marlene? Reeve. He and his wife are trying for a kid, and they love having Marlene around. She even calls him 'Uncle Reeve,' can you believe that?" He smiled. "He's real good with her, picks her up from school even when he's supposed to be working. He helps her with her homework too, which is a real blessin' for me. I never went to school, ya know?" He shrugged, "It wasn't a big deal when I was a kid, cause there wasn't no school in Corel, so I can read okay, because my Momma taught me how, but I don't write too good, and I don't know what the hell the difference is between a numerator and a denominator. I don't even know what I'd do without the guy, because I can't stand to look stupid in front of my own daughter."

She put a hand on his shoulder."You are an excellent father Barret." she said with confidence.

He smiled at her, "But seriously Tifa, I need you around. She needs a Lady around sometime. I watched her spit on the ground the other day, and I nearly shipped her off to girl's private school."

They both laughed. Barret took a Swig of his coffee. "So what'd you do after Cloud left?" he asked.

Tifa laughed. "Well, I was all set to embark on this epic journey of self-discovery and didn't end up getting very far at all."

Barret smirked, "Epic Journey, eh? Tell me more."

"So I decided that I needed to start from Nibelhiem, from the beginning, right? Well I get there, and I visit my parent's graves, and said hello and all that, and I decided to take a walk around the old ShinRa Manor. So I'm exploring, right, and I hear this sound, like footsteps, so I get freaked out, and I go to leave. As I'm going to leave, I hear this booming voice saying 'who's there' so I hurry down the hall, to where that old secret passage to the basement is, and I'm so surprised by someone standing there, that as I go to run down that old spiral staircase, that I bail over the edge, and I knock myself out and I break my wrist and my ankle."

Barret cringed, "Ouch"

"Yeah, anyways, so I wake up in the dark, and there's Vincent standing there, just lurking around while I'm sleeping." She laughed. "So yeah, there's my epic journey," she finished.

Barret was howling with laughter at this point. "You're lookin' pretty good now, I take it Vinnie fixed ya' up?" he asked when he had calmed down a bit.

"Yep," she replied, "He was a real gentleman," She said, punching Barret in the arm. "Unlike _some _people I know."

"Hey now, I am a gentleman!" he exclaimed in mock offense.

"Pfft, no you're not Barret, a we both know it."

Barret laughed, "And why not? Because I don't get all the girls with my long flowing locks and mysterious personality?"

Tifa raised an eyebrow, "Ah, I _believe_ the term is tall, dark, and handsome, Barret."

"Whatever, I am waaay darker than his white ass."

"You're just jealous because I'm prettier," said Vincent in a cool monotone from where he leaned against the door onto the deck,

Barret just stared in surprise as Tifa cackled manically at the humor of it all.

"Yeah, you're real pretty, if ya know what I mean," Barret said jokingly.

Vincent cracked a small smile, "Really now Barret, stooping low enough as to bring my sexuality into question? I'm disappointed."

Tifa laughed, "I'm fairly certain that Mr. Valentine is very Heterosexual, Barret,you're just saying that because you're practically green with envy."

"Yeah, I'll bet you know or certain, hey Tif?" Barret laughed.

Tifa blushed so deeply that she had too look down at her lap.

Barret looked shocked. "Aw, no way! You didn't!"

"Oh come on, Barret," Vincent interrupted, saving the day, "Because I'm so sure that between Tifa breaking her ankle and her wrist and Cid picking us up almost the instant after she'd been healed, we've had plenty of time to knock boots. Really, you're embarrassing the poor girl."

"Ha ha, guess you're right, Dracula," Barret said dismissively. "Come on Tifa, it was only a joke."

Tifa laughed, trying not to sound to nervous. "You tease me too much Barret."

Just then, Cid's unmistakable voice came over the Ship's intercom. "Hey everyone. Y'all better get ready ta disembark, cause we're comin' up on Wutai real quick and we're all gonna go find Yuffie all nice and together-like. No complaining."

"But I hate Wutai!" Barret whined at the P.A, as if Cid could hear him on the other end.

Tifa rolled her eyes. "This should be interesting."

..::)O(::..

"I think I'll stay on the ship," Vincent said.

"Wait, why?" Tifa asked.

"I just don't like crowds," he answered.

"Wutai really calmed down as a tourist town you know, the crowds are minimal Vincent, so don't be a poor sport," she told him.

"Well maybe I just don't like Yuffie."

"That's a terrible thing to say. Come on there's no reason for you not to go."

"I just don't want to go."

Tifa cocked her head to the side and crossed her arms. Vincent was usually bullheaded, but never for no reason. "Why are you trying to avoid Wutai?" she asked.

Vincent shifted uncomfortably. "I'm not, I just," he hesitated, searching for an excuse, but finding none, "am tired," he finished weakly.

Tifa raised an eyebrow at him. "If I can manage, I'm sure you'll be fine somehow too, dramaqueen."

Cid laughed and patten Vincent on the shoulder as he walked past where they were standing on the boarding ramp. "Come on Sunshine, can you save your PMSing for later?" he said with a laugh. "Dramaqueen," he added with a sly grin as he ran to catch up with Red XIII and Barret who were already on their way.

Vincent grudgingly obeyed and followed as Tifa started walking. "So I notice you deigned it necessary to raid my clothing for my favorite sweater," he remarked in an unimpressed tone.

Tifa supped the neck of aforementioned sweater up to cover her nose coyly. "I was gonna give it back..." she said meekly.

Vincent shook his head and glanced quickly to their friends, walking far ahead, paying no attention to them, and ruffled Tifa's hair. She was just so...cute sometimes, for lack of a better word. "Don't take everything so seriously," he said. "Even _I _ don't take things that seriously."

Tifa laughed, still hiding inside the sweater. She smiled inwardly, happy that she could talk like this with him. She buried herself more deeply into the warm fleece of the sweater. Fall was starting to give way to Wutai's harsh Winter, signs of which could be seen everywhere. The morning sun glittered over the frost where it still sat on the ground, the tall grass chilling Tifa's ankles where the frozen chutes touched bare flesh. Leaves had long fallen from the trees, leaving the brown, skeletal remains to stand naked in the cold.

She could actually remember crying at seeing this occurrence last year. In Midgar, it never snowed, but it did get cold enough for trees to shed their leaves for the Winter months. She could remember crying when the tree she had planted in front of the bar had shed its leaves for the first time too. She had planted that tree, she and Cloud, and it was the first tree in Midgar for over fifty years, since the city have become industrialized. A sapling taken from Nibelhiem where the harsh winters made for hardy trees with deep reaching roots. Perfect, she thought, for Midgar, where the soil was so acidic from the mako that leached from the earth there. Lifestream was the holy essence of all life, but in its purest form, mako, it becomes toxic, and it killed anything that tried to grow there. Evidently, With the Lifestream all rushing to that spot at once, combined with the three years of time the soil there was allowed to heal, certain hardy plants, weeds mostly, but still, were able to be grown there, but hers was the very first tree.

Marlene had stared in wonder when she had seen the little green thing sticking out of the dirt as if it had been the most wonderful thing she'd ever seen. She had never really seen green. Sure, she had green crayons, and green clothing, and she had seen green paint and even green jello, but she had almost never seen it like this, the way that green was meant to be. Of course, she had decided that from that point on, the tree old be called Red, after her favorite cat, who had been almost as delighted as Marlene had been over the tree as he was over it's name.

It was Cloud who had told her that the tree would come back. Of course she knew that, but it was still sad that it was gone.

Cloud.

What would she ever do if he were to come back again?

She took a surprised Vincent's hand in hers, lacing her fingers between his. "I-I'm really grad that I came to Nibelhiem. I'm really grad that I found...you," she said, resting her hear on his shoulder briefly.

Vincent smiled briefly. "I'm glad you found me too," he told her.

"I was alone for a long time Vincent, even before Cloud left, I was still alone because he was never really there. I'm just so happy that I' not alone, even just for now."

Vincent nodded, in truth, not being alone was...nice. He was glad he had her, but he noticed her use of the phrase, 'even just for now.' She was thinking the exact thing he was: that what was going to happen to them was uncertain. How could he ever lead any sort of normal life outside of this? Outside a life of fighting, and violence, how would he, could he, function as some semblance of a normal human being? Could he ever be with Tifa? Surely not. Likely, the events of last night would not repeat themselves any time soon, and he and Tifa would continue on in an awkward parody of what they had been before last night. She had been so vulnerable last night, and he had been vulnerable to her, he touch, the comfort she offered him. It had been so intoxicating, to the point where they had fallen into each others arms in what he was sadly certain would turn into a sort of one night stand. Tifa did not love him, but had sought comfort in his body in her time of need. He was happy in a way, that he could have been there for her, but felt used at the same time. It hurt, but he was glad to have been there for her. What she wanted of him was unclear. Did she want him to be her confidant? Her lover? Friend?

He glanced at her to find she was looking up at him with a warm smile on her face. Perhaps it wasn't so meaningless after all. Her hand tentatively reached for his, and then slipped her fingers between hers.

"I'll be here as long as you'll have me," he told her, _and I'll be whatever you want me to be._

**A/N: Hey guys, what angry? Just because they did the do, doesn't mean that they're going to jump into each others arms and confess their undying love to each other. The world doesn't work that way. Ha ha but seriously guys, please review. Sorry to all who found the chapter boring, next one will be good, I promise. Look forward to a fist fight between Yuffie and Vincent. Woo woo, I've said to much!**


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